environmental arguments

There is a lot of discussion and debate about the environment among Christians these days. Some saying we need  to take global warming seriously and really strive to take better care of God's creation. Others say we don't know enough; some even doubt that global warming is happening. Some say that God gave us the earth to use, not protect.

Here is a blog post that presents perspectives of Rob Bell and John MacArthur. Funny how people can read the same thing and see so differently--the blog author obviously agrees with MacArthur; I had the opposite take. Bell's perspective seems to me to be much more in line with my understanding of the nature of God and His creation.

I'm also really uncomfortable with MacArthur using the 2 Peter passage to justify an attitude that says we don't need to care for the planet. I know he knows the Bible far better than I, but I don't think that is anywhere near the intended point of the passage.

Anyway, read the two perspectives and tell me what you think! The environment is a topic we will be talking about at Convergence later this year.

basketball and community

This past weekend George Mason won three tournament games to claim the Colonial Athletic Association Conference Championship. (and I was there for all three--a great, but long, weekend in Richmond).

Beyond the excitement of winning the tournament, the weekend got me thinking about family, and community, and having fun.

I spent the weekend with four guys who are great friends--some who have been my friends for over 20 years. We go to the tournament every year. 

We laugh and joke and reminisce and tell stories; there is this incredible comfort level knowing we are loved and accepted unconditionally by one another. 

We make decisions together as a group the whole weekend; rarely is there any tension or conflict. (not that conflict is bad; but there is this level of unity that we have achieved over the years).

We start looking forward to this weekend for months ahead of time, because it provides an opportunity to do some things we all need:

• get away from work and responsibilities at home
  
• act like kids again
  
• laugh at ourselves and each other, in a spirit of love
  
• enjoy just being, not doing
  
• celebrating victories together (and sometimes lamenting failures)
  
• enjoying some of life's little pleasures--good food, good beer, and great basketball (is there a better sport than college basketball? I don't think so, especially after winning a championship!)
  

These are the kinds of relationships we are trying to build at Convergence; where people are loved and accepted and really like spending time together.

more richmond

one more day in Richmond--we beat UNC-Wilmington 53-41 to advance to the championship game against William and Mary tomorrow night. Go Patriots!

richmond

Louis Birdsong with a tremendous dunk

Yesterday was great--I went to Richmond with my friends Kenny, Andy, John, and Mark for the Colonial Athletic Association basketball tournament. We go down every year, kind of a guys' getaway. It's usually a weekend of great food and beer, reminiscing about our college days, and going horse yelling for GMU.

Mark drove down while Johnny played dj with Mark's ipod. We had lunch at Legends; the weather was lousy on the way down, but cleared up enough for us to have lunch on the patio. 

The game was great--we took a big lead in the first half; but had to fight to keep them from coming back; final was 63-52. We always top off the night by walking to a seedy pizza place for a couple slices.

After breakfast at the 3rd Street Diner; we're relaxing and reading the paper, getting ready for tonight's semi-final game against UNC-Wilmington.

I've tried to start using this blog to talk about spiritual things--while this post may not seem like it, it is. These annual treks are a great example of true community. These guys are like brothers to me. The traditions we have built over the years are very important to each of us. We look forward to the break from everyday life for months; and have fun the entire weekend. 

That's important. When was the last time you took a weekend, or even a day, devoted to nothing but having fun? If it's been a while, get our calendar out and schedule a day.

my back hurts

ok, pretty self-centered title; sorry about that. Yesterday was a really long, hard day, but also a really good one. A, one of the ladies in our church, had cancer surgery. The surgery went well, but she is probably facing a painful recovery and chemotherapy.

I was at the hospital most of the day, waiting with her family. The good part was having conversation with different relatives, talking about our kids, listening to the stories and adventures of A's life and family.

It's never fun to be with people when they are in anxious situations like surgery; but it is encouraging to see and experience the spirit of God as people gather and tell their stories and put their trust in God when they are afraid.

almost forgot--the back pain came from spending most of the day in chairs that were side by side, and conversing with people next to me rather than in front of me. I spent much of the day with my head turned one way or the other; and have a wicked pain in my neck and upper back today...but when I think of my friend with cancer, seems pretty trivial.

please pray for A--for quick recovery and that cancer is contained.

new york

sorry for the lack of posts lately; the past week was a blur. Lisa and I went to New York Thursday for the International Arts Movement gathering. It was fantastic. Here is IAM's vision:

IAM gathers artists and creative catalysts to wrestle with the deep questions of art, faith and humanity in order to inspire the creative community to engage the culture that is and create the world that ought to be.

It was so cool hearing what folks there are thinking and talking about and trying to do--the parallels with Convergence are amazing. It was really affirming to us that God is doing something new and exciting, and has called us to be a part of that. 

Over the next few days I'll post different thoughts about our time in New York...more later.

lent and chocolate

We're about halfway through the season of Lent. Lent is not a common practice in many Baptist churches; and I didn't plan well enough for us to really observe it at Convergence; but I did talk a little about it Sunday...

I gave up chocolate for lent this year. A really big deal for me. I love chocolate. I've done pretty well--there have been a couple times when I almost ate some--not on purpose, but just because I forgot. Which tells me I may not be thinking and praying about this very well...

I've also been trying to practice silence more--being still and silent in prayer (my friend Josh's idea). It's been really good. 

Talking about silence and listening in church, and practicing it more myself, is preparing me for Easter.  Meditating on his death and resurrection is helping me to think more about the idea of expectation, anticipation, longing for connection with Jesus. 

I feel like I'm closer to Him than ever--I'm trying to live in an attitude of prayer most of the time. It is easier when things are good--and these days I experience his love in much of my life--my family, my job, my friends...(it does get tougher when I'm tired and grumpy; but that's life...)

Lisa and I leave for NY early tomorrow; we're going to the International Arts Movement conference. Should be really good! But I already miss my family. (GMU has a late game; so I'm staying at my friend Kenny's house tonight).  

more on belonging to God

OK, yesterday I wrote about belonging to God, and realize some may read my opening as contrasting belonging to God with having right theology and doctrine...and I'm sure many would say you can't belong to God without right theology and doctrine.

that's just not an argument I want to get into. My point was that we often make too much of making sure people are right, to the detriment of helping people to be loving. I think God wants us to be learning and growing...but I think it saddens Him that so many Christians are spending so much time and energy critiquing and criticizing each other, because they don't agree on theology and doctrine.

I want to know God more intimately; I want to understand His heart and mind and perspective as much as possible. But I don't want to set myself as the judge of others; and it burns me when others try to do so. God is big enough to help us know what He wants us to know. 

I think we should pursue truth, but even more we need to love and serve and give. We need to look for what God is doing and get in on it. There is way too much poverty and hunger and oppression and slavery and illness and death and violence and war in our world. In light of that, most of our debates over theological interpretation seem trivial to me.

I hope that when this life is over and I'm completely in God's presence I'll get the answers to my questions; until then, I need to spend my life caring for others.

belonging to God

Whoever belongs to God hears what God says.

John 8:47

Belonging to God. Not having the right theology. Not having the right doctrine. Not having all the answers. Belonging to God. If I belong to Him; then I hear him. I get really irritated when I hear or read people who have it all figured out, and are critical of those who don't agree with them (probably way too irritated).

Although I'm sure they don't mean to, their attitude often seems to communicate that God belongs to them, rather than they belong to God. I mean their idea or understanding of God must be captured and defined and then held up as a standard to which all others must agree and comply.

But I think belonging to God is completely different. It's all about being His child. It's first about receiving His unconditional love. It's about loving and seeking and reaching out to Him. Being held and loved and cared for by Him. I don't get everything about God. I don't understand a lot about the state of the world and God's role in it; i.e. evil and suffering. 

But I trust that He is here. I might not always "get" Him, but I belong to Him. I experience His love in countless ways--through the joys of life with Him--my family, my home, my friends, my faith community, my books, my music...

He created me. He is working on me. He loves me--when I'm right or wrong. When I'm wise or clueless. I am His. I belong to Him. And although it's often scary, I think I hear Him more and more.

how God speaks

Sermon on the Mount by Gerald Shepherd

In the past God spoke to our ancestors through the prophets at many times and in various ways, but in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son, whom he appointed heir of all things, and through whom also he made the universe.

Hebrews 1:1-3

God's greatest form of communication is not the Bible--it's His son. Jesus. John says Jesus is the Word of God.

In human form He brings the message that God tried to communicate to his people for thousands of years. He fulfills the law that God gave His people, that they couldn’t obey.  

Jesus is the Word of God, He embodies all that God wants to communicate to us. The Bible is where we go to learn about the life of Jesus.

God speaks to us through Jesus, especially the words and actions of Jesus, that we read in the New Testament. If we want to know God’s heart, God’s desires, God’s plans, God’s wishes, God’s perspective…we’ve got to know Jesus.

We've got to read His words, and learn about the events of His life. We’ve got to let His words and thoughts enter and fill us. We’ve got to meditate and ponder and pray—and as we do that, we listen, and allow His spirit to speak to us.

If we want to hear God through Jesus, a great place to start is Matthew 5-7, Jesus' Sermon on the Mount.  

Here He summarized beautifully what God has to say to us. The bottom line is to love God and love people. We can spend hours dissecting that, asking exactly what does that look like for us as individuals, and as a church; but that's the starting point. Love God, and love people. If everything we do meets the criteria of those commands; we can’t go wrong. 

As we ponder how God speaks; I am challenged to really make time and space in my life to listen and just be with Jesus. I sometimes get so caught up in ministry and theology, that I miss out on the real experience of connecting with Jesus, my savior, my creator, my friend, my father. I am reminded over and over that it always comes back to silence--making time to be present with Him.

hearing God

We've been talking about the importance of listening to God; being present with Him, silent before Him.

This week we started talking about hearing Him. If we're silent, if we're open, if we're making space in our lives to listen; what does it look or sound like when He speaks? How do we hear His voice? How do we know it's His voice we're hearing?

Again, in worship this week, I encouraged us to spend some time in the questions, rather than look for quick answers. One question we ask is "What am I listening for?" (Or to be grammatically correct--"For what am I listening?")

Am I listening only for specific answers to specific questions? Or am I simply listening because God is there, speaking, working, loving, reaching out?

Instead of coming to God only with specific questions or problems or requests, I need to go to God open to hear what He is saying, looking for how He is working in my life, seeking His perspective instead of my own. I need to ask for what He wants, rather than telling Him what I want.

If prayer is about more than just asking and answering, if it's about connecting and communicating with God, them I need to approach Him without an agenda, with more than my prayer list; I need to approach Him truly open for whatever He has to say.

Over the next few days I'll look at some Scripture passages we looked at while talking about this.

Wendell Berry--my new favorite writer

I just finished A World Lost by Wendell Berry. Wow. The best book I've read in a long time. He is an amazing writer; writes the most poetic prose I've ever read. I'm eager to read all of his work.

Rather than write a lot; I encourage you to look at this website--all about his works, life, reviews, blogs, discussions,etc.

thanks to Josh and Seth for recommending him!

prayer--just being

There is a significant difference between doing and being; and recognizing that difference can have a big impact on our prayer. Life, especially in this area, is busy. We are always doing, and therefore become more comfortable with it.

At work we do all day. At home, we work on the house or yard, cook or clean; when we stop, we watch TV or listen to music.

We tend to do the same thing in church--always doing something--praying, singing, reading, listening, talking--we spend our time doing things, rather than being present with God.

Sometimes the best thing we can do for God and our relationship with Him is NOTHING. Sometimes we just need to be present with God.

Prayer is an attitude of God-consciousness and God-surrender that we carry with us at all times. I want to live every waking moment with an awareness that God is with me and that he is actively involved and engaged in my thoughts and actions. 

God wants to hear our thoughts, fears, questions, desires, feelings...but before we take our stuff to Him, we need to take time to be still and silent before Him--just listening; just being.

election

Ok, I don’t want to get all political, but I have to say that yesterday was profound. I voted in the VA primary, and it was the first time in over a decade that I was really excited about voting for a presidential candidate. 

As a pastor I try to be accessible to all people; and don't want to say things that will put up walls. I respect people, even with different opinions and perspectives--heck, my wife and I rarely agree when it comes to politics, and I love and respect her deeply.

Anyway, I am excited about the history being made here. There is a good chance we will have our first female or African American president. There is a good chance that our next president will take steps to get us out of the civil war in Iraq. These are exciting possibilities to me.

It is so rewarding to participate in this process. In the midst of a hard week, voting gave me a lot of joy and hope.

more thoughts on prayer

One theme, probably the main theme, throughout the Bible is that God wants to be in relationship with  us. He knows us and wants us to know Him. He loves us and wants us to love Him. He communicates with us and wants us to communicate with Him.

Prayer is the primary way that communication happens. It is how we know and hear and talk to God.

If we believe that God is God and I am not; then the thing we should do most is listen. God has a lot more figured out than I do. How am I going to know God, and learn from Him, if all I do is talk to Him, telling Him what I want and think and feel?

If prayer is going to help us know and hear God, we've got to shut up and listen. We've got to stop going to Him with an agenda each time and just be with Him.

I love being with my children. We don't have to do anything, just being with them is pure joy...listening to my 21 month old sing, hum, try new words...watching my 5 month old smile and giggle when I talk to him...holding my pre-teen daughter when she is hurting or upset..I love just being with them.

God wants the same with us--to just be with us. To be by our side as we walk through life. Prayer happens when we are as aware of Him as He is of us; when we acknowledge Him and live life with Him. It isn't always doing anything in particular; it happens when His spirit and ours come together.

VOTE!

OK, last post of the day. Don't forget to vote! I recently found out that in VA, you don't have to be registered as a Democrat or Republican to vote in the primary. As long as you are a registered voter, you can choose which primary to vote in. 

So go make a difference in this historic election year!

read this blog

You really need to read this blog--unwordable words. He echoes a lot of my thoughts; but much more eloquently! It's great (but really long--give yourself some time)

a couple excerpts:

"if the church isn't ready to start hitting the issues with explanations based outside of our cultural mindset as well as being willing to dive deeper, the church could die..."

"in order to live a life that embodies the Gospel, we must dive deeper into the scripture than the standard sunday morning message and apply scripture to our lives, rather than applying our situation and culture to interpret scripture."

why pray?

Two weeks ago at Convergence we invited people to give their questions about prayer; the most common was "why pray?" So last night we talked about that. 

We had a small crowd; so I thought I'd post some of what we talked about. I'll probably do it a little at a time throughout the week.

One of the things we are trying to do is move beyond the common answers. In recent years I have been examining some of the things I was taught years ago and continued to hold onto without thinking (how to read the Bible, how salvation works, nature of prayer, church, that Jesus is a republican...)

I have also become aware of the huge divide between the conversation we usually have in church, and the conversations I have in seminary classes, and with others in ministry.

In church we often try to address a topic in an hour; or if it's really big, in a series over a few weeks. Either way, the goal often seems to be to figure out whatever we're talking about; and by then end of the sermon or series, we act as if we now have all the answers and move on to something else.

But in class, we talk about a topic for two hours a week for four months; and still don't have it figured out. We dig a lot deeper and really wrestle with Scripture, history, different understanding and interpretations. We also learn to work and think for ourselves, rather than just telling people what they should believe. (I want to do the same as a pastor).

Now I know church is not seminary. But I do think it would be good for our discussions to go a little deeper; for us to be more real and honest with questions, and not just settle for simple answers. 

One gentleman expressed concern that we not make Christianity more mysterious than it is--wanting to be careful to not be like cults that elevate secrecy and mystery.

I understand that; but I think in our context the greater challenge is to not simplify the Bible or our faith. The Bible is full of mystery. It's not a simple how-to-live-life manual. 

The fact that we found 366 verses that mention prayer; and that we had a lot of great questions come out of that, tells me there is a lot to dig through to understand this one topic. People have been studying the Bible for 2000 years and still can't agree on it. We need to dig in, and keep at it.

So we're not going to be afraid to get our hands dirty. We're going to dig deeper, discuss, ask hard questions, and most of all practice prayer in the coming weeks; not just to figure it all out, but to encourage and challenge each other on the journey of living life with God and one another.

death and life

Thursday I attended the funeral of a gentleman who passed away after a nine year battle with cancer. I did not know Alman well; we saw each other once or twice a year for the last few years; but he was one you remember. He had a dry sense of humor and was always fun to talk with. 

I went to visit him about a week before he died. I was nervous on my way to his home; not knowing how alert he would be; what we would talk about. Although he looked very thin; his eyes were the same--full of life and wit.

He joked about feeling like the pope, the way people were coming one after another to visit him, most probably feeling uncomfortable. What do you say to a man who is going to die soon?

I have been in enough similar situations to know that the best thing is to just be real and natural, and most of all, listen. We talked about basketball--Alman was a UNC alumn. 

On the wall behind the sofa where Alman sat was a print of Rembrandt's The Prodigal Son. I don't know a lot of art, but knew that one. Henry Nouwen wrote a wonderful book based on the painting. Turns out Alman had read the book as well, in fact said it was one he went back and reread periodically. 

So we talked about the painting, and the book, about how the main idea is that at different times in life we are like all three characters in the story--the prodigal son, returning home after living selfishly; the father, forgiving and welcoming his son; and the older brother, jealous of his forgiven brother.

For just a few moments I felt so connected to this man who accomplished a great deal in this life, and by all accounts was an honorable, loving, Godly man. It felt strange to walk out knowing it was the last time I would see him. I was taken back to my father's death, and then thoughts of my own death. 

I don't really have any profound thoughts. I believe in heaven; although I don't know what it's going to be like--I think our modern supposings are more hopeful than accurate--I think it's something beyond what we can even imagine...

but being around death usually challenges me to live more now--be more present with my kids and my wife; try harder to enter the lives of the people I do church with; most of all it challenges me to connect with God, to seek Him, be with Him.

One of the ways I'm trying to do that these days is through silent prayer; just being with Him and listening to Him. So I go back to the beginning of this post and enter a time of prayer where I contemplate this beautiful painting, and the love of God behind it.

nature writing

I'm part of a writing circle that meets weekly, led by my friend Nina. Nina is great; she gets me thinking and writing like I haven't in years. 

Today we wrote about nature. Nina showed us a picture of a beautiful beach and asked us to write. (It wasn't one of these, but close enough). Below is what I wrote in response to the image.

Why do I see images of places that I long to go to, be in, experience, live in; yet I stay here, in a city that I don’t really love, that feels heavy and crowded and busy and rushed.

I love the beach and blue water and mountains and trees and waterfalls. Why do I live in a place that doesn’t really have any of that? I look at pictures like this and am filled with longing. I remember times when I have visited places filled with such beauty.

Sanibel Island. We vacationed there three years ago, and it was wonderful. White sand, cool water, waves, shells, amazing seafood. We spent days walking on the beach gathering shells, biking along paths, looking at incredible plants and flowers and trees and animals.

One morning I got up and rode to a local coffee shop to get some work done. I imagined that I was a famous writer, that I lived on the island, and spent my mornings writing in the coffee shop; listening to the stories of both locals and tourists.

Then I thought, why couldn’t I just find a job in a place like this, and be in beautiful surroundings all the time? Would I grow weary of the beauty of nature if I lived there? Would I tire of the beach and ocean? Would it lose it’s mystery and magic?

I don’t know, but I would like to find out. I’m starting to think that life is too short to wait to try and risk and experiment and pursue dreams.

Then I realize that is a lot of what we are doing here at Convergence. We are trying to risk and experiment and pursue dreams. I love what I am doing. I think it’s just the location or setting that I wish were different.

My life has been marked by moves to new places. Maybe there is another one not too far off—and maybe next time I will look at the world around me and choose someplace that grabs my desires and dreams the way this beach does.

confession

What a night. I just finished watching probably the second greatest upset I've ever seen, as the NY Giants beat the New England Patriots in the Super Bowl (the greatest upset was Mason beating Connecticut to advance to the Final Four in 2006)...

But the highlight of my night was dinner and communion at Convergence. We had our first annual chili cook-off. Our panel of expert judges chose my friend Jason and my step-father Jerry as the winners! There was some great chili!

Dinner was great, then we moved into a time of prayer and reflection, focusing on confession. I'm afraid it's an act that we don't take seriously enough; but scripture addresses it often.

I encouraged people to confess their sins to God; and we gave them the opportunity to express confession creatively, by writing or painting. We also had communion tonight. 

Jamie and I prayed and took communion together; it was powerful. I had to confess I haven't been very loving lately; but sharing that worship experience tonight was very healing. 

It was really cool watching people pray, paint, write, take communion, listen to music--worshiping in individual ways; yet together as a community.

what is prayer?

We have discussion/practice times on Sunday nights; usually about different spiritual disciplines or practices. Sunday night we talked about prayer. I talked about how our Sunday discussions were usually pretty surface, with a lot of "church" talk, and not a lot of honest, deep conversation.

When it comes to prayer, we usually fall back on the definitions we learned as young Christians; and our practice of prayer often reflects that. It was obvious that most people had a pretty big gap between what they thought prayer should look like in their lives and the reality of it.

I said we were going to learn as beginners; not depend on the easy answers we've always clung to.

I challenged us to be more real and open; starting with our questions. I told everyone we would discuss questions tonight; not answers. That was hard for a lot of us, but really good.

I had people write their thoughts and questions anonymously rather than discuss. I was amazed at the results!

We started by writing out what we thought prayer was, how it works, and why we do it. We got very diverse answers; which told us that we are often on different pages when it comes to language. Even a seemingly obvious word like prayer means so many different things to different people!

Then we looked at Scriptures with the words "pray" or "prayer," to get a sense of how diversely the word is used there. Then we wrote our questions, doubts, confusions about prayer. Here are a few responses:

• Why does God want us to pray? (Amazing how many people said this...I realized that a lot of us pray, and say it's important, but don't really know why)
  
• Why is it OK to pray for revenge against enemies in the Old Testament yet we are told to pray for enemies in the New Testament?
  
• Are formulaic prayers acceptable to God?
  
• Does God change his mind when we pray?
  
• Why does the OT contain so many answered "I want revenge" prayers? How do we reconcile this in light of "do unto others?"
  
• "Ask and it shall be given to you" doesn't seem to be completely literal, because I've asked, but it hasn't always been given.
  
• How long do we pray for the same thing?
  

This is just a sampling. I was glad that people were so honest; now the challenge is to begin digging into these questions. Several people said they were really excited about the conversation, and where it goes from here.

We spent some time praying; and I said that one of the ways we will learn more about prayer is by actually doing more, both individually and as a community. I felt like the evening was a big step in where we are headed!

life and death

Been thinking a lot about death lately. The Sean Taylor murder a few months ago hit me hard. It's always shocking when a young person dies--we just happen to notice the celebrities--like Heath Ledger the other day. 

Yesterday I spent a little time with a gentleman who is dying of cancer--his doctors have told him he has a few weeks; maybe days. I have several friends and relatives of friends dealing with cancer...

There are times like this when I think about the fragility of life, the inevitability of death, the enormous, incomprehensible idea of eternity; and I feel pretty small.

As a pastor, I know people are looking to me with similar thoughts and struggles. And while I don't necessarily have answers, I realize how important it is to provide opportunities for people to talk and ask questions and just be together in the midst of all this.

At the same time, these thoughts cause me to turn to my children. I realize how precious each minute with them is. Tonight was boys night--my wife and daughter were out so I was home with the boys. I spent some time just holding them and loving on them. 

This Sunday we will talk about prayer at Convergence. I'm still putting my thoughts together; but I want to direct a conversation that is real and honest. I think we often try to explain prayer and how it works, and by doing so miss its power and beauty. But while the Bible says a lot about prayer, I don't think it makes it easy or maybe even possible to come up with a systematic answer of how and why to pray. 

It's late at night; and there is a lot more to it than this; but right now I'm thinking the bottom line is to simply spend time with God--apart from our requests, regardless of results or outcomes--prayer is simply listening to and spending time with God. For most of us, it always seems to turn to asking.

check out some great music

Please check out 7 Sopranos, led by Convergence's Cynthia Cole. They will be performing at Convergence on February 8 and 9-don't miss it!

I'm not an expert on jazz; but I know what I like. Christina Crerar has an amazing voice; and music that I love listening to! We're hoping that Christina will be singing at Convergence in the near future.

read this

OK, my partner Lisa just wrote a really beautiful piece about our jazz service. You have to read this. Now I am challenged to be as eloquent. Probably not going to happen today.

We are both going to try to blog about topics related to Convergence, arts, the Church, etc.

random sunday thoughts

Another great weekend at Convergence. Saturday we had a meeting with different people and groups who use our facility. We expected about 8 people; over 20 showed up! We had great discussion and got to know some folks better.

Thank you so much to friends from Valley Drive Preschool, Songwriters Association of Washington, Arlington Artists Alliance, Northern VA Chinese Christian Church, 7 Sopranos, Nina Sichel, Club Tiger Productions,

We then had a work day--doing some cleaning and organizing. Most of the folks from the meeting stayed to help. I sensed a wonderful spirit of community among a diverse group of people. We are really seeing the original dream and vision lived out more and more.

Last night Jay Smith, Convergence musician of Middle Distance Runner fame, hosted a great concert with his Club Tiger Productions.

Tonight Never in Denver led us in a wonderful worship time at our monthly Jazz at the Vespers.

Great things are happening at Convergence!

feedback is good

I'm emotionally and spiritually exhausted. It's been a busy year so far (I know, it's only been two weeks--but I feel like I've been running the whole time)...lot's of good stuff, but lots to do.

I had lunch with a good friend who is also a pastor, and he gave me some really good constructive criticism. Not fun to hear, but very helpful. I realize that I need to step up as a leader; do something we talk a lot about--take risks.

I also realize that we need help. I have tried to do too much on my own, and not asked others to help us enough. I want to work on that.

I need to get back to work. I feel like I have about 10 hours worth of work to do, and only about 2 more hours today. I'll start with some prayer.

"dreaming of a church where..."

as a young church; we are constantly reading, listening, talking, exploring what other churches and leaders are doing to create the best community possible to love and minister to people. I'm currently reading Doug Pagitt's Church-Re-Imagined.

Doug is getting a lot of press these days; and is being branded a heretic by some. That's ridiculous. I've met Doug, had some great conversation with him, read and listened to a lot of his stuff. Bottom line for me--the man loves Jesus, loves people, and wants to help foster God's kingdom here and now. (I will not join the debate over Doug's theology--I tend to agree with a lot of what he says; but realize that those who don't aren't interested in conversation, just debate).

Anyway, in Church Re-Imagined, Doug starts off with a list of things that Solomon's Porch (Doug's church) desires to be..."We Dream of a Church Where..."

number one is "We listen to and are obedient to God"

I like it. One concern I have with a lot of evangelicals today is the idea that God is done speaking, and what needs to be communicated is their interpretation of what God said in the past. On that last point--we need to be very discerning and know there is often a difference between what God has said, and what people interpret God to have said.

I'll talk more about Scripture in the future, but for now let me say that it is obvious to me that the Bible is vibrant and alive and mysterious and scary and encouraging all at the same time. The more I know it, the more I realize I don't know it. I will spend the rest of my life wrestling with it and growing in it...But I do believe God has spoken through it in the past, does today, and will in the future--though not always in the ways we have learned or assumed.

I believe God is still speaking--through people, through His Spirit, through the events of our world, and through the Bible...While God himself may not change--our perceptions and understandings of Him do, as we grow and experience Him in different ways. We can't be obedient to God if we're not listening to Him in the now. I'm scared and excited that listening to God and being obedient to Him is an ongoing learning process; not something to be figured out and solved.

enjoying the journey

It is good to have an end to journey towards, but it is the journey that matters, in the end.

Ursula Le Guin

Sometimes in "church work" we get so focused on the goals that we kind of gloss over what's going on right now. I have a lot of hopes and ideas of where Convergence will be in the future; but I really want to enjoy where we are now as well. We are building such a beautiful picture of community, of family--one I've never experienced in an institutional church.

I keep remembering a conversation last night, after a beautiful worship service, where about 5 of us were standing around talking and laughing. No one was trying to impress anyone else; we were talking honestly about life and death and family problems; but it was so cool to hear people sharing and listening and being able to laugh about life.

Now things aren't perfect--we desperately need to start raising more money--a lot of it...and I still drop balls and make mistakes and forget all kinds of stuff. And sometimes people do stuff that I just get.

But I love what I'm doing. I love the people that are giving and sacrificing because they see how important this thing called Convergence is. And I love the atmosphere when we gather--holy and down to earth, solemn and silly, truly authentic. I really believe God is doing something new and unique and really important. It's exciting and humbling to be a part of it!

great weekend

it was a great weekend at Convergence. Friday we hosted the opening reception for an exhibit by the Arlington Artists Alliance; it was wonderful. I had a lot of great conversations with artists, art lovers, friends and neighbors. There is a lot of really beautiful work; I encourage you to come by and see the exhibit sometime!





On Saturday we hosted the monthly open-mic night of the local branch of SAW--the Songwriters Association of Washington. Another great night--lots of fantastic music.






Tonight our own Kathy Berlin shared her testimony in song--a creative telling of her story through beautiful music. (unfortunately I forgot my camera).

I'm exhausted--but it's a really good exhausted!

new name

you may have noticed my blog has a new name (or not--not sure if anyone is still reading these days). not sure if I'll keep the name; I'm still thinking through it.

the idea is to connect my blogging to Convergence more...I'll still write about a variety of topics; but will try to write more about what's going on at Convergence, what I'm learning and doing and trying as a pastor, and encourage more conversation about God, spiritual formation, art...

on writing

I love to write—well, sometimes I love to write. Sometimes I go into it kicking and screaming, but I feel like I am supposed to do it. Writing is one of those things that makes my life feel more complete—like praying, exercising, eating a little better and making sure I’m spending quality time with friends and family.

Something feels off or missing when I realize I haven’t written in a while. I believe I have potential as a writer. I think with more discipline and guidance I can write well, dig deeper, explore more, express myself more openly and honestly…There is so much inside me that I feel and think and wonder—I want to communicate that, interact with it, wrestle with it, --and writing is one way I can do that.

I have been participating in some writing workshops at Convergence, led by my friend Nina. I love the times when we gather to write and read and encourage each other. It makes me think that I really can do this; and helps me get the ball rolling…I really need to make writing a habit, something that I do regularly, often, with discipline…I spend a lot more time wanting to write than I do actually writing, and I’ve got to move past that.

At this stage in my life writing helps me see things more clearly. Life is really full right now—marriage, kids that seem to be multiplying, church, house, yard, cars, friends, basketball, traveling….my life feels like a box of toy balls that is constantly overflowing, there isn't room to contain it all, so every time I get hold of something and put it back in the box, something else falls out and I have to go chase it. Sometimes that’s fun, sometimes just exhausting.

Writing helps me put down the box for a little while…

saturday

no significant title, because I'm not sure what I'm writing about...I just know I need to write. Met with a spiritual director Thursday; really good conversation. I'm looking forward to growing this spiritual friendship; I think it will be really good for me.

I've been tired for the last couple weeks--boys are sick so no one is sleeping much...feeling overwhelmed with all that I need to do in the new year; most of all; I need to make more time to pray!

It's january 5 and I have kept my new year commitment so far--to spend 30 a day exercising. It got a lot easier when I cleaned off all the junk that had accumulated on top of the treadmill for months. It's nice to walk/run and watch football at the same time!

GMU won today; Redskins lost to Seattle; so I'm up and down.

a new year

exciting--but very challenging so far. Had a great Christmas and new year; but both boys have been really sick. I've been completely exhausted for the last week; only sleeping in 2-3 hour stretches most of the time. We closed the office at church, so it's been nice to be at home, especially with everyone sick and tired.

I am excited about the new year. Great things happening at Convergence, and with family. My one new year commitment is to exercise 30 minutes every day. I ran on the treadmill today; felt great!

Back in the office tomorrow, a lot to do in next few days to catch up.

Sunday I spoke at FBC Herndon, talked about opportunities God gives for fresh starts and second chances, main example was the life of Peter. He gets a bad rap as the guy who denied Jesus; yet that was really the only negative we read about his life--in everything else he was an amazing man and disciple. I long to be that faithful.

harp 46--buy the cd!

Saturday night we hosted a CD release party for Harp 46. What a great honor! It was a wonderful time...just what I needed after a pretty crazy week. You really need to buy this CD--the music is fantastic. But not only are these guys (Nuc, April, Posido, and Amanda) great musicians; they are all really super people. I love working with them; and am grateful that we get to host them at Convergence so frequently.

The evening started with an exhibit opening reception for Nancy Lynch. Nancy's work is beautiful; it was a great evening!

Here are some pictures from the evening:

i need to blog more

OK, I'm really seeing the affects another baby has on time. It speeds it up. Drastically. A couple months ago I said I was going to blog every day. Then my third child was born; now each day I run out of time with lot's left undone. Including blogging. Even now, I need to get ready to take my daughter to her homeschool co-op. So I need to run...but wanted to write.

random thoughts...things at Convergence are going well; more happening, meeting lots of people, gelling as a community...growth is slow and intentional, we average around 30 most Sundays; but last two jazz services have had over 80 people. We've got some new folks who are plugging into the community; will be a great addition, especially as we expand what we're doing musically.

Cindi sang for us last Sunday and did a fantastic job.

we just finished our first writing workshop; it was great. We'll offer some more after the holidays.

Please pray for my boys-- my youngest has bronchiolitis, a respiratory tract infection, and his brother has been coughing as well.

GMU is off to a fantastic start; 6-1, 1-0; beat Drexel in the conference opener 85-38 last night.

springsteen concert

I posted this on our family blog; but know only a few people have access to that (it's for family and friends; if you'd like to see it, let me know and I'll send you an invitation).

Sunday night A and I went to see Bruce Springsteen in concert. It was my 10th time seeing him; A's first. It was so great sharing that with her. She was one of the youngest people there!

Wild coincidence--I went back in my old journals and discovered that the first time I saw Bruce was Sunday, November 11, 1984; the tenth was Sunday, November 11, 2007. How cool is that!

We both had a blast. It was great watching her reactions throughout the evening. A loves the drums--she loved "She's the One"--especially when Max blasted the drums. We both love "Badlands," she lit up and started clapping when it played. It was a great bonding experience for us--I love how she enjoys my music! I'm going to make a cd of all the songs he played that night.

At 58, Bruce still puts on an amazing show. I remember 4 hour marathon shows back in the 80s; nights that were so exhausting I was relieved when they were over. He doesn't play as long these days--2 hours 15 minutes--but his energy is still incredible!

I later found a website that gives playlists for all Springsteen concerts dating back to the late 60s! So I found playlists for every concert of his I've seen. Pretty cool.

switch to macbook

I'm typing this on my new macbook (well, it's not technically mine; it belongs to my church)...but I've made the switch. Pretty cool so far; although I'm just beginning to learn how to use it.

Way busy last few weeks--church going well--started series using Exploring the Way workbook on Sundays...trying to get a diverse group of people thinking about and practicing their faith in some new and creative ways.

My car died the other day...mechanic says it has a dead cylinder and needs new engine. We've had some folks offer to loan us a car for a while; and we're looking into options for something at little or no cost...Stressful, but I have faith it will work out somehow.

Tonight is the season opener for GMU basketball--I can't wait!

Sunday night A and I are going to see Bruce Springsteen. I'm really excited to share this with my daughter. It will be my 10th time seeing him. I'm really digging the new album; I highly recommend it!

miniseries

ok, I realized I was getting kind of stuck with the book reviews...my original idea was to write about a wide variety of topics...so I'm just picking random stuff.

tonight--miniseries. I love books. I love movies. I've found that some of the best film adaptations are miniseries. Very rarely does a two hour film capture the heart of a novel; but a miniseries often can.

So, here are my suggestions for great miniseries viewing:

1. Lonesome Dove--simply the best. Tommy Lee Jones and Robert Duvall each give the performance of a lifetime. Duvall has said Gus McRae was the role he was born to play. Fantastic soundtrack as well.

2. Band of Brothers--I don't usually like war movies; but this was phenomenal. I had to buy it and watch it about once a year.

3. Roots--perhaps should be number one; but not as fresh for me. Everybody should watch this. Everybody.

4. Storm of the Century--Stephen King at his best. The scariest miniseries or TV movie I've seen; not just because of the monster, but because of incredible good and evil that humans are capable of.

5, Andersonville--powerful true story of prisoner-of-war camp in the Civil War.

5. The Shining--a very faithful adaptation of one of King's best novels. Stephen Webber gives an amazing performance.

6. The Stand--based on what I consider to be King's best novel. Not as great as the book; but that would be impossible. Gary Sinese in the role that made him a star.

I'd love to hear your suggestions!

great evening

We had a great time at Convergence today. It was our monthly jazz service, with Harp 46 leading this month. It was also the opening of the Convergence gallery; we are hosting part of the Washington Theological Consortium's exhibit on The Body of Christ.

The whole evening was wonderful. The music was fantastic as always. Harp 46 is so great to work with. The reception after worship was great--people ate and talked. We don't make a big deal about numbers; but we had our largest crowd yet--85--lots of visitors!

Afterward Lisa and I had dinner with some folks from Vienna Baptist Church; talking about ways we can work together.

I'm still feeling pretty high.

random thoughts

I've been horrible at posting lately...life is just way too busy (my constant excuse). We had a baby three weeks ago (well, my wife did all the work). She doesn't like me to post personal stuff on here for the world to see, so we have a family blog (pictures and family news) open by invitation only. If you know me, and would like to see it; let me know and I'll send an invitation.

we had a great service Sunday afternoon; talked about Lament. We had a dramatic reading of some Psalms of lament, then talked about what lament is; then had people write their own laments. I hoped one or two might share theirs; about 10 people read theirs--very powerful! I often feel so busy on Sunday that I don't feel focused on worship; but this week was great.

If you haven't listened to Sinead O'Connor's CD Theology; I recommend it. We used the song "Rivers of Babylon" Sunday. (The lyrics are from Psalm 137). We've used a couple of the songs in worship...

church is good; lot's going on...trying to figure out how to recruit and equip volunteers, best structure for leadership...

I finally ordered a macbook--UPS's website says it should arrive today!

Just ordered Tim Keel's new book, Intuitive Leadership: Embracing a Paradigm of Narrative, Metaphor, and Chaos ...very eager to read it!

Still working my way through Brian McLaren's new book; great so far; I'll write more soon...back to work.

please pray

One of my favorite people is Kenn Kington. Kenn is a fantastic comedian, writer, and speaker. Even more, he is a fun, loving, Godly man. I met Kenn four years ago at a ministry conference. We hit it off right away and have stayed in touch since. He's been a great friend to us at NorthStar--speaking at our annual meeting in 2004, leading a singles conference in 2005, and bringing his Ultimate Comedy Tour to Columbia Baptist and to GMU.

Kenn has also been a great friend to our family. He and Ashley are great buds--she gets to go backstage and hang out when he performs nearby; and he once came to watch her play soccer. Kenn is truly one of the good guys.

I just found out yesterday that Kenn's four-year-old daughter Kennedy Grace has Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia. She was diagnosed in April and is undergoing treatment. You can read about Kennedy Grace here.

Please join me in praying for Kenn and his family. I also highly recommend his books--great stuff on relationships, and his DVD's--great family comedy.

more from Everything Must Change

working through Brian McLaren's Everything Must Change. Great read so far; very relevant to thoughts I have been having--which I find often happens with Brian's writings.

He talks about how he was influenced by the situations of people in other countries--Rwanda, Burundi, South Africa. I have been struggling with this; feeling that we (western Christians) are concerned about people near us--we are horrified at violence and terrorism and disaster when it happens in our own backyard; but not so concerned when it is on the other side of the world.

Brian confesses that for years,

I also knew that most churchgoers, including myself, either didn't share that concern for the poor or didn't know how to turn concern and good intentions into constructive action. (p. 16)

In chapter five Brian says that the Christian religion

has specialized in dealing with "spiritual needs" to the exclusion of physical and social needs. It has specialized in people's destination in the afterlife but has failed to address significant social injustices in this life. It has focused on "me" and "my soul" and "my spiritual life" and "my eternal destiny," but it has failed to address the dominant societal and global realities of their lifetime: systemic injustice, systemic poverty, systemic ecological crisis, systemic dysfunctions of many kinds. (33)

Brian is often accused of focusing too much on social problems and not enough on the spiritual. But I think he is saying they must go hand in hand. God doesn't separate them. Jesus said we should love people and meet their needs--physical and spiritual.

The Christianity that we live out here doesn't make much sense in much of the world. How can it, when we are so rich, yet do so little to alleviate suffering in much of the world?

I'll climb off my soapbox. I'm loving this book; it has me thinking much more globally, which is what I believe God wants for those of us who follow Him.

good week

OK, I'm still a long ways from writing every day, as I intended. Oh well.

It was a good week--we had our first jazz service last Sunday; it was awesome! Never in Denver led the service; they were incredible! We're going to do this the third Sunday each month for a while.

Lisa and I led worship at Daybreak Community Church today; giving them a little taste of Convergence. It was good--Lisa did a fantastic dramatic interpretation of Luke 8.

Hear the new Springsteen song here.

I'm sitting in my office on Sunday afternoon, listening to Harp 46 rehearse. How cool is that!

comments on Everything Must Change

Started Brian McLaren's new book, Everything Must Change: Jesus, Global Crisis, and a Revolution of Hope. Really good so far. This book is written as a companion piece to Brian's last book, The Secret Message of Jesus, which Brian recaps in chapter one:

Jesus' message is not actually about escaping this troubled world for heaven's blissful shores, as is popularly assumed, but instead is about God's will being done on this troubled earth as it is in heaven.

He begins Everything Must Change with a discussion of what he sees as critical global crises, and some of the causes of these crises--the key one being a spirituality crisis.

Chapter two begins with two questions that have shaped McLaren's life:

1. What are the biggest problems in the world?
2. What does Jesus have to say about these global problems?

Combined into one question: What could change if we applied the message of Jesus--the good news of the kingdom of God--to the world's greatest problems?

This really speaks to me. I've been increasingly frustrated that we spend so much time and energy and money on the big issues according to the Christian/political right--abortion, gay marriage, trying to fix some countries (while letting genocide continue in others). These are important issues; but what about poverty, hunger, AIDS pandemic, war, violence, the health care crisis...?

Brian's questions seem like they should be obvious, but when we look around, not many of us are letting them influence us. I want to be a part of changing that.

new McLaren book

I got an advanced reader's copy of Brian McLaren's new book, Everything Must Change. I'll begin reading and blogging about it tonight!

listening

Obviously I have a severe case of writer's block. Been really busy, but want to write, just need to do it!

We've been talking for last few weeks about faith and justice, trying to get our small faith community to try to see people, life, issues--from God's perspective, and from the perspective of those who are different. I think that those of us in power--for the most part, white, upper middle class Americans--struggle to read the Bible as God intends--because much of it is written to the poor, oppressed, and marginalized.

So I want to find ways to help our folks see God's heart for people like that; but struggle in how to do it. What do I say? What stories do we tell? What videos do we watch that will help us get it? Then it hit me that we need to stop trying to say too much; and start with listening. Being quiet and still before God. Instead of discussing with each other and giving our ideas and answers, we need to be humble and pray and ask God to change our hearts, our perspectives, and to help us see more with His perspective.

So I'm trying to be quiet and listen, and encourage our folks to do the same.

Brian McLaren interview

Here's a great interview with Brian on The Wittenburg Door.

slowly working through Pete Rollins's book

Haven't posted about Pete Rollins lately...from chapter three of How (Not) To Speak of God:

...our reflections on God never bring us to God...speaking of God is never speaking of God but only ever speaking about our understanding of God. (p. 32)

This inspires me to seek God humbly. To strive to know Him better, and receive His love; but not to think I've got Him figured out. When I read others who say the Bible is clear and without ambiguity; I just don't think that's honest. The Bible is wonderful and confusing and beautiful and mysterious. I don't think God wants it to be easy for us. I think he wants us to pursue Him and wrestle with the Bible; always asking and listening and learning.

Here is one of the posters from Emerging Grace:

check this out

There is this huge thing going on between emerging church folks and several folks who run watchdog websites--people who feel it's their calling to point out why everybody who thinks differently is wrong.

One of these sites is Pyromaniacs. They recently published a series of posters mocking the emerging church conversation. They are very creative, but a little mean-spirited.

Emerging Grace has just published a series of posters that better represent her perspective on the conversation. They are really wonderful.

oops

Two days ago I said I was going to try to post every day. That didn't last long! It's 11 pm; I'm totally and completely exhausted. After a very stressful week I preached twice today; at New Hope (our old church) in the morning, and at Convergence tonight. I don't see how many pastors do this every week.

But it's a good kind of exhaustion; it was a good day; got to spend time with a lot of friends, old and new.

I spoke this morning about finding our identity in God's love. Simple yet profound; something that I think many of us just don't get. I spent some time reading some other blogs; watching people fight about doctrine and right belief; totally void of the love of God. Sad. I shouldn't waste my time there; but it's like passing an accident and not being able to keep from looking.

Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent.

John 17:3

random thoughts

I'm allowing myself to be way too busy. I'm going to try to start writing every day; even if it's just a sentence or two. God is getting our attention in a big way right now. We recently found out our health insurance is not going to cover Jamie's pregnancy and delivery of the baby (Jamie is due in 6 weeks). There was a waiting period when we added Jamie to the policy, and we didn't read the fine print. Dumb mistake on my part; but I'm not going to dwell on it...

This has forced us to our knees, praying for faith that God will provide, and wisdom to make good decisions. I'm stressed, but that keeps me turning to God. We've talked about doing a home birth with a nurse or midwife--anyone have any experience with that?

I'm working on a sermon for Sunday--preaching at New Hope, my old church--about how we often find our identity in what we do, rather than in God. Very good stuff for me; I'll post some notes and thoughts when I'm done.

I am grateful to Stushie, who reviewed my blog here and encouraged me to write more often.

baseball

I went to the Nationals' game vs. the Cubs Monday night with John, Kenny, and Ed. I love baseball. There is something about the perfect symmetry of the field, the green grass, the relaxed pace that suddenly gets broken by a hit or a run...the ballpark has always been one of my favorite places to watch, eat, drink, and hang with friends.

But baseball is also hard for me these days. I used to umpire high school ball in Texas; it was a real joy and passion in my life. As a single guy, I worked games 5-6 days a week and loved it. My best friends were guys I worked with. Some of my favorite memories are umping tournament games at the Rangers Little League park, then going out for dinner and beers with my buddies. I remember working a no-hitter thrown by a guy that later got drafted. I once worked a ten-year-old AAU national championship game--what a celebration!

Since moving to VA and becoming a husband and father, baseball has taken a backseat. I haven't umped a game in five years; and I really miss it. I can't drive by a high school field without feeling a deep sense of loss and longing. And if there's actually a game going on when I drive by--forget it; I'm depressed for a few hours.

Now, I wouldn't change anything--my wife and kids give me more joy than I've ever known. But I still miss baseball. I hope that in a few years, when we're past the baby stage, I'll be able to get back into it. I look forward to taking Brady to his first major league game, and teaching him the intricacies of the game. Baseball is a lot like life--full of beauty, sometimes slow and relaxed, sometimes full of confusion and surprise and heartbreak. Some games you can't wait for the end; others you wish would go on forever.

As I sat and watched the other night, I felt so content; happy to be with my friends, feeling a cool summer breeze, seeing some good baseball action, and thinking of my family waiting at home for me--one of those "life is good" moments.