Monday, April 18, 2011

reading through A New Kind of Christianity--clarity and mystery



(not sure what I'm trying to say with this image, but it is rather thought-provoking)


From A New Kind of Christianity by Brian McLaren:

Does the Bible alone provide enough clarity to resolve all questions, as a good constitution should? No. We have no reason to believe it was ever meant to do that, as much as we’ve tried to force it to do so. From all sides it becomes clear that the Bible, if it is truly inspired by God, wasn’t meant to end conversation and give the final word on controversies. If this were its purpose, it has failed miserably. (This fact must be faced.) But if, instead, it was inspired and intended to stimulate conversation, to keep people thinking and talking and arguing and seeking, across continents and centuries, it has succeeded and is succeeding in a truly remarkable way. (p. 92)

God’s purpose in the Bible isn’t to give us encyclopedia-like answers. It’s not to end the discussion with the simple, final solution. As Brian said, if that were its purpose, it has failed. We have hundreds of Christian denominations in the US, many thousands worldwide. If the Bible is so simple and clear, how can we—the Universal Christian Church—be so divided? There are so many differences, yet each group believes they have the right answers and the correct interpretations.

I wonder if having it all figured out causes us to rely less on God. Following God becomes a list of do's and don’ts (even though we claim it doesn’t)…And if we think we’ve got it figured out, then the only thing left is to do what we think we’re supposed to do.

With everything figured out, there is no mystery. There are no questions. We don’t really even need much from God now, God has served his purpose by giving us the Bible and the correct interpretation and understanding. In that line of thinking, all we need now is God’s strength and discipline. Seems like a pretty shallow relationship to me.

The older I get, the more I realize there is more and more that I don’t have figured out. Things that don’t make sense to me. Questions about the diversity and complexity I see in the Bible, in my fellow man, in myself, in the world we live in. I feel like I am more childlike, not out of anything noble, but because I am often clueless before the God of the universe.

But God does not leave me in my ignorance—rather, God reveals himself in the amazing stories of the Bible, and in the conversations I have with my wife and my friends, and in the laughter of my children, and the joy I find when I teach, or write, or umpire.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Reading through A New Kind of Christianity


I'm reading A New Kind of Christianity by Brian McLaren. Brian's writing has really spoken to me over the years. I remember the first time I heard of him--it was actually the first time I met him. He was speaking at my first Leland retreat in 2002. I was drawn to his gentle spirit, his passion for God, his honesty.

We have connected several times over the years, and I am always encouraged by his words; both in print and in our conversations. Several years ago we had a conversation at a church where we happened to run into each other. We were talking about something--I don't remember the topic now--but his eyes lit up at something I said and he opened his Bible and read a passage that spoke to that topic. His love for Jesus and people was obvious.

Brian doesn't need me to defend him; but I realize that by identifying myself with him, I may need to defend both of us to people who see him in a negative light. One of the images that often gets used by Brian's critics is the "wolf in sheep's clothing" label.

You may not agree with Brian (I don't always agree with him), but he is nothing like a wolf. He is a gentle, humble man who strives to be faithful to Jesus. And the more I read the Bible, and pray, and get to know my Savior, the more Brian's ideas ring true to me. A New Kind of Christian was life-changing for me, as well as many others.

I'm not going to review the book, but share some passages that speak to me and cause me to think as I read it. I really like the discussion of how we often view the Bible as a constitution (which I have never believed it was meant to be seen), rather than as an "inspired library." That makes a lot of sense to me. Here goes:

The Bible, when taken as an ethical rule book, offers us no clear categories for many of our most significant and vexing socio-ethical quandaries. We find no explicit mention, for example, of abortion, capitalism, communism, socialism, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, autism, systemic racism, affirmative action, human rights, nationalism, sexual orientation, pornography, global climate change, imprisonment, extinction of species, energy efficiency, environmental sustainability, genetic engineering, space travel, and so on—not to mention nuclear weapons, biological warfare, and just-war theory.
(p. 68-69)

This doesn't mean that the Bible doesn't or can't speak to this topics. But it does mean that any conclusions we draw about about God's perspective on these topics (and many others) are filtered through our own thoughts, biases, presuppositions, desires, understandings and interpretations.

In case after case in the past, there is a kind of Bible-quoting intoxication under the influence of which we religious people lose the ability to distinguish between what God says and what we say God says.
(p. 70)

We must have some humility and open-mindedness to be faithful. We can't become so arrogant that we are convinced our perspective is the absolute truth, and everyone else has it wrong.

I recently read a quote by a big name pastor and author in evangelistic circles. Speaking of C.S. Lewis, he said, "
...there is no one quite like him. He does so much good and gets some things so wrong." He's basically saying that when he agrees with Lewis, Lewis is great; but when they disagree, Lewis must be the one who is wrong. That kind of arrogant self-confidence is dangerous. It's OK to disagree, but none of us are always right. Teachability is crucial for growth.

We are not all going to draw the same conclusions, and we must be careful not to be so rigid that we don't allow ourselves to learn and grow and evolve. Yes, I said it; our faith must evolve, as our relationship with and understanding of God grow.

As my faith has evolved, I feel less certain about some things, but more convinced of others. I am more convinced that God loves us and longs to live in intimate relationship with us. I am more convinced that God is working to establish His Kingdom more and more in our world. I am more convinced that nothing is more powerful or wide or deep as God's love.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

sheep


© 2006 Fran Mallon

For the Lord YAHWEH says this: 'Look, I myself shall take care of my flock and look after it. As a shepherd looks after his flock when he is with his scattered sheep, so shall I look after my sheep . . . I myself shall pasture my sheep, I myself shall give them rest-declares the Lord YAHWEH. I shall look for the lost one, bring back the stray, bandage the injured and make the sick strong. I shall watch over the fat and healthy. I shall be a true shepherd to them.'

Ezekiel 34:11-12, 15-16


I've fallen into a trap recently (OK, maybe for the last couple years) of talking more about theological differences and conflict than about God, his love, his Kingdom, and his hopes for us and our world.

Those who know me know I have gone through a transformation over the past 5-10 years; from being conservative both theologically and politically to rather liberal/progressive. I don't really like those labels--for a lot of Christians, liberal means less dedicated to God and/or the Bible. Although I see things very differently than I used to, I am more committed to God than ever. I love and appreciate the Bible more than ever. I want to follow God and strive to live out the Kingdom faithfully.

But I don't think that looks the way I used to. I don't want to get into philosophical differences. I want to try to use this space, and my time writing, to be positive about God, faith, life, love, people, Jesus, the Bible, etc.

Our culture has become so divided, it's easy to fall into debate. I don't want to do it anymore. I want to focus on Jesus, and His Kingdom, and how to live it out. I want to teach my children how to love God and love people with all their hearts.

The passage above, taken from today's reading from Phyllis Tickle's Divine Hours, reminds me that God is watching over us, loving us, seeking us. We often feel like we've got to correct each other, and make sure everyone is believing the right way. We fight to get things figured out, then fight to make sure everyone else listens to us and understands and agrees.

I want to let go of that. I just want to be one of God's sheep; content to live in His care. I don't want to care so much if others agree or disagree with me. I want to live out God's love so much that others are intrigued and want to know God too. Then I want to trust God to take care of them, like the good shepherd He is.

Friday, April 15, 2011

trying to look outward

Entering the City
Jan Hynes

I have been lousy at writing. I often start to write something here, then think, "That's not worth blogging about. No one wants to read that." But I need to stop worrying about that, and just write. The writing is as much for me as anyone else, maybe more so.

I also don't want it to just be talking about my life. We have a family blog for that. (That one is by invitation only--so let me know if you'd like to read it.)

It's been a difficult couple years spiritually--since leaving Convergence. I've got some great friends that encourage me spiritually and emotionally; but what I really miss is having something regular--a group of people who invest in each other's lives; encouraging, challenging, serving.

I need to be serving even more than I need to be served these days. Life has been so fluid and changing these days that I just don't feel grounded. Our job situation, our living situation, our finances--are all so uncertain; the result is we spend all our time and energy thinking about ourselves. We become so inwardly focused.

As I watch my boys play, I realize that's not what I want for them, or for us. Even when life is difficult, especially when life is difficult. We need to be focused outwardly. I want our lives to be devoted to loving God and loving other people.

I'm going to find something to do with the boys today that helps us do that. Maybe we'll go out in the neighborhood and pick up trash, making God's beautiful creation a little less soiled. I'm going to schedule some time to get with a few of the people who encourage me and draw me closer to God.

This is the purpose of this writing--it helps me connect with God, and with myself, the part of me that often gets buried under the junk of life, the part of me that is simply a child of God.

I'll close with a Palm Sunday prayer from my daily Emergent email, by Christine Sine:
Let us enter the city with God today
Let us sing hosanna to our king
To the son of God riding on a donkey
With shepherds and prostitutes,
With the blind and the leper
With the abandoned and oppressed
Let us shout for joy at Christ’s coming
And follow the One who welcomes the sinner and dines with the outcast
Let us touch and see as God draws near
Riding in Triumph towards the Cross


Tuesday, March 01, 2011

update

Thanks to Gator Gal (who are you?) for the push--I was shocked to see how long it has been since I posted. The winter has been good but hard. Still no permanent job. I have been doing a long-term sub job teaching 11 and 12 English at Ashley's school for the last 3 months; it's been great. I'll finish up this week; then go back to regular subbing.

I recently had an interview with a private school; hoping to get news about the job in the next day or two; so I'm pretty anxious right now.

Not preaching much these days; I was helping a church through the summer and fall; but they called a pastor and don't need me any more.

I started doing P90X in December and have been enjoying that; I'm in the best shape I've been in for many years.

This coming weekend is Richmond weekend; the time of year (next to Christmas) that I most look forward to. Several of my college buddies, and a few who have joined us over the years, go to Richmond to watch George Mason in the Colonial Athletic Association mens basketball tournament.

We get a hotel suite and spend the weekend watching basketball, eating, drinking, and walking around Richmond. We've been doing it for almost 10 years; it is truly one of the highlights of the years. I love the freedom--for 3-4 days we have no responsibility, no schedule, no work--just fun. We talk, walk, tell stories, share memories, enjoy great food and beer. I love it. This should be a good weekend; hopefully we'll win the whole thing, which means we're in Richmond from Friday through Monday.

And as much as I love it, by the end I'm ready to go back home, because I miss my family.

Life is really good and really hard these days. But I continue to try to trust God (I don't always do it well). I believe/hope that 10 years from now we'll have some great stories to tell about how God sustained us and was working to bring us to some great things.

Saturday, October 30, 2010

family update

Hello to you faithful few who check in here once in a while. I keep meaning to write more...well, good intentions and all that.

Life is beautiful and stressful these days. Still no full-time job. A few interviews, but no results. Had one church ask me to be their pastor, but the situation wasn't right for my family. We are still hoping to move to Washington, so we're looking in both places.

I'm looking at more school--CPE (Clinical Pastoral Education) at Mary Washington Hospital; and a secondary education licensure program at Mary Washington University.

I'm getting sub work most days at N. Stafford and Mountain View (Ashley's school). In fact, next week I'm going to be subbing in Ashley's English class--on her birthday! How cool is that!

Baseball is winding down; I got lots of umpiring work this fall, have games for the next week or so, then it will be done until March.

The kids are great--Ashley ran cross country and did very well--she had a hip injury and ran through the pain most of the season. In the district meet, she was obviously hurting with each step. When she crossed the finish line she burst into tears from the pain. I would not have been more proud if she won the race. Hopefully she can rest and heal some now (although she still has a few weeks of soccer).

Ash is loving high school and doing great in her classes. She and I get along better than ever, talking and laughing about school, boys, and teachers. We watch Modern Family together--it's great!

The boys are doing well; they go to preschool three days a week and love it. Their teachers say they are bright and fun and sweet. We got both boys baseball gloves this fall and they love playing ball. We're cheering for the Rangers in the World Series; getting a little worried!

Jamie is working part-time as a shift supervisor at Starbucks. She's great at it; but we're all feeling the financial stress. We've put the house on the market, hoping to sell soon. She's also trying to do a lot with her Stampin' Up business; she is really creative and loves it.

Even with the stress, life is good. The kids give us so much joy. We've had fun going to high school football games; they love it--cheering for the wildcats, talking to the teenagers, drinking hot chocolate. Today we're going to Kings Dominion for the last time this year.

I'm trying to spend more time praying and being aware of God's presence. There are a lot of "why's" and "what's next" and "what do we do" questions these days. I'm trying to not get caught up in the questions--but trying to pray and look and listen.

Tuesday, October 05, 2010

Fresh Starts and Second Chances

Here is a link to a video of me preaching on Fresh Starts and Second Chances at FBC Springfield a couple months ago. First time I've seen myself preach on video. Feels weird. I like the message, but I said "umm" too many times.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Jesus and Establishment

First night of my final class at Leland; Who is Jesus. Should be a good class, last night about archeology; good stuff.

Got me thinking about Jesus and how he was perceived by his peers, and how people today perceive him. Very differently. Jesus was anti-establishment. Strange how we have made him the center of the establishment.

I'm not saying he shouldn't be the center of the church, he is and should be. So perhaps I'm saying the church shouldn't be so "established." It doesn't get much more established than the way many of us see and do church.

But Jesus didn't lead an organization. He led a wild, diverse group of rebels and revolutionaries. He and his followers rebelled against the established religion of the time--not by bringing a new religion, but by bringing truth and honesty about the relationship between God and his people. He pointed out how God's followers missed the mark, and tried to help them see God more the way He wanted them to.

Jesus taught that what mattered was one's heart and actions. It was about loving God and loving others, not about following all the laws just right. He talked over and over about helping, serving, giving.

I grew up hearing that the Christian faith was about getting right with God--being born again, living righteously, doing what I was supposed to...good things, but it was all about me doing what I was supposed to in order to please God.

There was little focus on others--ministry and missions was kind of an afterthought, and still more about me doing the things I was supposed to, than it was about the people I was to serve. I think this attitude is still prevalent among many evangelicals.

Over the last 10 years my perspective has changed radically. The black and white, cut and dried, questions and answers faith I had is gone. I still believe in Jesus, I still love and worship him, but I have more questions, more wonder, less clarity and simple answers.

Brian McLaren's book A New Kind of Christian really captured what I've been thinking and feeling. This description from his recent book A New Kind of Christianity does as well:

My disillusionment was intensified by what was happening in the Christian community in America during the 1980s and 1990s. A large number of both Protestant and Catholic leaders had aligned with a neoconservative political ideology, trumpeting what they called "conservative family values," but minimizing biblical community values. They supported wars of choice, defended torture, opposed environmental protection, and seemed to care more about protecting the rich from taxes than liberating the poor from poverty or minorities from racism. They spoke against big government as if big was bad, yet they seemed to see big military and big business as inherently good. They wanted to protect unborn human life inside the womb, but didn't seem to care about born human life in slums or prisons or nations they considered enemies. They loved to paint gay people as a threat to marriage, seeming to miss the irony that heterosexual people were damaging marriage at a furious pace without any help from gay couples. They consistently relegated females to second-class status, often while covering up for their fellow males when they fell into scandal or committed criminal abuse. They interpreted the Bible to favor the government of Israel and to marginalize Palestinians, and even before September 11, 2001, I feared that through their influence Muslims were being cast as the new scapegoats, targets of a scary kind of religiously inspired bigotry.

Their stridency and selectivity in choosing issues and priorities at first annoyed, then depressed, and then angered me. They had created a powerful, wealthy, and stealthy network dedicated to mobilizing fighters in their "culture war."

So now we have growing numbers of churches and communities pushing back against this mindset--typically labeled the emerging/emergent church. In many evangelical circles, McLaren and those who think similarly are branded rebels, revolutionaries, even heretics.

It seems obvious to me the establishment that the emerging church is pushing back against has a lot in common with the established religion of Jesus' time and place.

Many of us are asking questions and exploring different ways of worshiping and fellowshipping and being the church; not because we want to destroy Christianity, but because we love Jesus, and long to create a church that continues to become more of what Jesus lived. A church that is not focused on itself, but on doing anything and everything possible to live out the Kingdom of God. A church that takes risks and asks hard questions and is willing to try something different, even radical, for the sake of Jesus and His Kingdom.

I have said things like this before, and fear I am doing too much deconstructing, and not enough building up. That's where I want to try to go. I want to find new ways of doing community, or church, that focus on others, seek to serve and give, aren't so concerned with organization and structure, but on relationships.

I think it starts close to home, so Jamie and I are talking about getting something going with our neighbors. After three years of pastoring a church that is an hour away, I am eager to do church with people down the street, even next door.

We're just starting to talk, but I need to make sure we take some action.

One example--we have some friends who are not currently plugged into a church. They are committed Christians, but are looking for the right community. So lately, they have been seeking people and organizations to whom they can give their tithe/offering.

Knowing we are in a really desperate financial situation, they gave us their most recent offering. That's what the church can be; people who live in community together sharing, giving, serving. I'm so grateful for the gift, and also thinking of how we can give or serve them in some way. Maybe they'll be a part of whatever church community we get going.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

thoughts on the "ground zero--mosque" controversy

Matt Sledge at Huffington has a great piece on the "ground zero--mosque" controversy.

here are a few of my thoughts on the situation:

I think there is a big difference between "at" ground zero and a few blocks away. Much of the conversation I'm hearing assumes that the community center/mosque is going to be right where the towers stood, and that's not the case. I would hope that hearing that fact could impact people's perception.

I want to believe that we as a nation can rise above and continue to promote the freedom and liberty we always have--for all people, regardless of religion or race.

I guess the big difference here is that some people cannot or will not separate the terrorists of 9-11 from all Muslims. For me, it's like holding all Christians responsible for the actions of one who kills an abortion doctor, or identifying all Christians with someone like Fred Phelps, the Baptist pastor who disrupts soldiers' funerals, preaching that those deaths are God's judgment on America.

For those of us who are Christ followers, I think we share His love when we relate to others, even Muslims, with peace and love rather than with protests and exclusion. I think Jesus would condemn the actions of the terrorists, but not hold it against other people who were not involved, just because they share a common race or religion.

I realize my perspective is different than a lot of Christians, and I want to have the same grace and understanding toward them that I am asking for; so I don't mean to come across too strong.

community

I posted the following under the comments of a recent post, but realize few people probably saw it...plus, I want to add some thoughts.

I think one of the struggles is building authentic community as an organization. community happens best organically, naturally.

I have four friends that I watch GMU basketball with. We have known each other for years, love and support one another, feel totally comfortable together. That's real community.

The few churches that I've seen that have done well at building community started with a commitment to selflessness and serving. They also encouraged people to be deeply involved in each others' lives on a daily basis, not just on Sundays. It's hard to build these things into an existing community if they are not part of that community's DNA from the beginning.

But even those churches struggled when they got bigger. I am a big fan of smaller when it comes to church/community. (Take a look at Dave Browning's Deliberate Simplicity; great book)

My friend Joey was working on a model of bringing Jesus and the Kingdom into existing communities--families; neighborhoods, businesses, etc.--rather than building new communities and inviting people--giving them one more group/thing that cuts into their time. This really intrigues me.

I'm a big fan of small--small communities, small groups, etc.

I have a good friend who stopped going to church recently. Bottom line--he loved it when he knew most of the people--when the church was 200 people, there was a real family feel. Now that there are 800 people, he feels lost, not as connected. I understand.

I would prefer to start a community rather than join one--with people who are like-minded, who want to share their lives; live near one another, serve each other, worship and fellowship together.

Ideally, I'd love to find a non-church job and have the freedom to start something new--a community that I didn't have to depend on for income.

OK, lots of random thoughts; still thinking about how this would really look.

Sunday, August 01, 2010

Springsteen in London


If you have never seen Bruce Springsteen in concert, than you have not seen the greatest live show ever. Plain and simple. You may not agree, but you'd be wrong. I've seen over 75 concerts in my life, many of the biggest performers over the past 30 years, and no one puts on a show like Bruce. No one's body of work over the last 35 years compares to his. And the energy of Bruce and the E Street Band in concert is unparalleled. The guy is 61, and rocks harder than most people half his age.

A high school friend introduced me to Bruce's music in 1983. Up to that point, I usually just listened to the radio, and Bruce has never been much of a mainstream radio guy.

But when Jeff played "Born to Run" for me, I was hooked. Here was great, driving, rock music with stories and characters and images--all very real and powerful and fascinating.

On November 11, 1984 I saw Bruce in concert for the first time. I cannot describe how amazing that experience was. 23 years to the day later, I took my daughter to see Bruce in concert (it was my 10th time; I've now seen him 11 times).

Each time he puts out an album, I get it immediately; each time he tours, I try to get tickets. His music has become the biggest part of the soundtrack of my life. Each song takes me back to the time of my life when I first heard it.

Last week I got Bruce's latest concert video, from a performance at London's Hyde Park last year. It is truly the best of his concert videos. And the best part is that my boys love watching it--so we've spent a lot of time the last few days listening to Bruce and the band.

If you get a chance, give it a look/listen:

Badlands

London Calling

Waitin' On A Sunny Day

Born To Run

Sunday, July 11, 2010

uncomfortable thoughts about "church people"

OK, this may be just a time to vent. If so, feel free to move on. But I promised to write, and right now this is on my mind. I've been a "church person" for 25 years. I've been in ministry for 22. I have loved most of the churches and ministries I've been a part of. I have known many wonderful people, developed beautiful friendships, been taught and loved and encouraged and challenged.

But right now, I'm struggling with church and church people. Leaving my last ministry has been extremely hard, even over a year later. I know it's impossible to be objective, but I still feel like I was wronged by some people that I loved and trusted. It was hard watching people I really respected and admired make some choices that looked very poor.

I have seen a couple people that I considered good friends turn their backs on me, refusing to communicate at all--phone, email, facebook...it's hard, not knowing why people don't want to be friends anymore.

What prompted some of this was thinking about different people in my life; especially some who have been incredibly supportive and helpful over the past year, or even longer. What was interesting was realizing that many of them are not "church people," or even Christians.

There is K; a good friend who doesn't consider himself very religious--although he is becoming more and more spiritual in his thoughts and actions. He has helped me out financially and emotionally over and over for many years. He has supported me and put up with me and loved me unconditionally.

My friend N, who is not a Christian, and who I rarely see these days, but continues to follow me on facebook, and always has words of encouragement.

My relatives C and L; not church people, but the kindest, most giving people you could know. The always give and encourage and serve.

And several of those who have been there for me, who are Christians, are not necessarily ones I have been in church with. They come from other backgrounds and traditions--but have truly lived out the Kingdom in our relationship.

These are people I have close, open relationships with--regardless of church connection. So what does all this mean? for me, I realize that church is not where I am finding my spiritual support these days. Now, part of that is because I speak in different churches on Sundays; so I'm not at the church where we belong a lot. And it's hard because we live 45 minutes away. I would like to be in a church that is closer, but our kids are really invested there, and it has been great for them.

Now, I do have many wonderful Christian friends who continue to love and support and encourage--especially J, M, A, K, D, E, T....and others.

But it struck me that the spiritual support in my life is mostly outside of a church community. I have mixed feelings about that. I have some thoughts, but want to spend some time with them before writing more.

I am always curious about feedback--who is supporting and encouraging you? Is it happening in church? out of church? both?

I'm off to umpire a baseball game, which is usually a very spiritual experience for me!

Wednesday, July 07, 2010

back again

I am the world's most pathetic writer. Four months since my last post. It's been hard to get motivated when I don't feel I have much to say. Being unemployed has a lot to do with it--after a year, it's easy to start feeling pretty low about my value as a minister and teacher. There have been a couple jobs that looked promising that didn't work out. I had an interview for a teaching position today that I thought went well. I should near something by the end of next week.

I'm tutoring and umpiring baseball. Still searching, applying, sending resumes, both here and in Washington. We were hoping to move out there this summer, but it hasn't worked out that way.

One plus to unemployment is having a lot more time with my family.

The highlight recently was graduating from Leland. Twenty years after taking my first class, I completed my MDiv. (Although I still have one class to finish up; I'm taking it as an independent study this summer.)

The graduation ceremony was great, and Jamie and my mom gave me a wonderful graduation party.

I am feeling the pull to write again--actually, it never leaves me; but I ignore it, and hide from it. But all I can do is keep trying.

Still feeling out there as far as community. We are back at New Hope, but I don't feel a part of things there the way we used to be. We'd love to find something closer, but haven't found anything yet.

OK, got to run--need to job hunt, and Top Chef is on soon.

Saturday, March 06, 2010

Richmond trip

Johnny, Kenny, and Andy outside the coliseum, before losing to VCU.

The view from our seats

I'm in Richmond for our annual trip to watch the Colonial Athletic Association basketball tournament. It's been a fun weekend, but we (George Mason) had a disappointing loss in our first game. After three straight years of making it to the championship game on Monday night, it feels strange to be done Saturday night. We have had some good food, and enjoyed hanging out in Richmond. We'll spend one more night and head home tomorrow.

working

Should have posted sooner, but with my lack of posts, I doubt anyone is reading. Maybe you have me in a feed that shows you when I post. If so, hello.

I am finally working--temporarily. I got a long-term sub job, filling in for a teacher out on maternity leave. I'm teaching 9th grade English at North Stafford High School, and loving it.

It was an exciting start. The school called me on Feb. 17 and asked if I could start March 1. I talked with the teacher and we planned to get together and work on the transition. The sub scheduler called me back that night, said the teacher went to the doctor and was put on bedrest, and could I start tomorrow.

It was a little scary jumping in with no prep time; on the other hand, we need the money so an extra week and a half was good. I have enjoyed getting to know the students and being back in a classroom every day.

The days are really long now--teaching during the day, then class and umpire training at night (I umpire high school baseball). I don't see my kids as much (that was one benefit to being unemployed). But the days and weeks go by really fast when you're this busy.

As I write this I am in Richmond for my annual trip to the CAA Basketball tournament with some college friends. It is great to get away and relax, not have anywhere to be or anything to do for a couple days.

The sub job will last until late April or early May, then I'll be looking again. I am flying out to Washington to talk with with a church about a job in April. I'm also trying to finish up several classes so I can graduate from Leland in June.

Life lately has been busy and stressful, but still a lot of fun.

Friday, February 12, 2010

winter update

I must write...I must write...

No job yet. A couple possibilities haven't panned out. Between Christmas break and all the snow days I haven't had much substitute teaching work this winter. So we're broke, praying for answers, trying to trust God.

I am going to Washington state for a week in March for meetings and interviews with several churches and schools. We're hoping to get a job there and move in the summer.

I usually love the snow, but after all the shoveling, I've had enough.

I have enjoyed good time with my family, having spent a lot more time at home than usual. And George Mason is having a much better season than I expected.

Life is good, stressful, frustrating, fun and always unpredictable.

In the midst of all this, especially with frustrating events (a church that offered me a job, then revoked the offer...a busted water heater that flooded our basement and family room...) the tendancy is to ask, "Why? What is God doing? Doesn't he know we don't have money for this? Doesn't he know we need that job? Why isn't he helping? Is he punishing us? "

But my mind goes from those questions, trying to understand why, to looking for how God is present in the midst of circumstances; even in little things: while cleaning out the flooded playroom, Jamie found my missing bluetooth...We're now forced to get started on the cleaning and purging we need to do before moving.

One of the biggest things was finding someone to help us with the water heater. Mike and Grace P. came down over bad roads; Grace hung out with Jamie and the kids while Mike helped us replace the water heater, and charged us much less than he could have. It also gave us a chance to have some good time with good people.

It's not productive for me to try and figure out why. I tend to do better when I seek to see how God is present and working in our lives, and the lives of people around us, especially when life brings challenges.

Monday, December 21, 2009

update

sorry for the long time between posts...a lot going on, but haven't felt like I have much to say. Life is good, kids are well (except for all the colds coming and going). I've been substitute teaching and tutoring; still looking for a full-time job. That's getting stressful; if I don't find something that pays better soon (like in the next couple weeks); 2010 is going to have a rough start.

But I'm trying not to be stressed. We have always done ok; God provides a way, something comes along...

I have been talking to a friend about a potential church position--just in early stages of conversation, so I don't want to get my hopes up, but it could be a wonderful opportunity.

I'm also looking at a business opportunity that might be good--although it would be very different for me.

I am also really enjoying being back in the classroom. I sub at North Stafford High School most days and have gotten to know a lot of the kids. It's been a lot of fun. I have taught two kids whose parents were classmates of mine in high school--that makes you feel old!

So life these days is up and down. I love my family, and spending time with my wife and kids. I love teaching, and I'm excited about future possibilities. I'm also still struggling with identity--for years my job/ministry was a big part of that--right now there's a kind of a void there.

We are snowed in a few days before Christmas; finally got the driveway cleared today. The boys love the snow. I'm looking forward to good time with family over the next week. Merry Christmas!

Friday, November 06, 2009

It's GMU basketball season!

My favorite time of the year is here--no, not autumn--I'm talking about basketball season! GMU played it's one exhibition game of the season last night, a 100-82 victory over Virginia State.

It was guys' night at the Patriot Center as I took my boys with me. I didn't know how they would do--as they have grown older their attention spans seem to shorten. But it was a truly fantastic evening.

I got the boys excited early, telling them in the morning where we were going, and helping them practice their "Go Mason!" yells throughout the day. C woke up from his afternoon nap shouting, "I'm ready to go to the basketball game!

The ride up was fun, talking about the upcoming game, singing and laughing. At one point B started praying (he has been praying with me at the table lately), saying, "Dear God, thank you for our food." C melted my heart by saying, "God, thank you for Daddy!"

We got to the arena, picked up tickets that Ken and Andy left for us at will call, and headed for the Patriot Club (where people who donate a lot of money get "free" food and beer). Kenny gave me a pass, which I handed to the portly usher at the entrance. He looked at the double stroller and said, "You gotta have three tickets."

I smiled and said, "Come one, they're toddlers, they're not gonna drink any beer!" He waved me through. Kenny got us some pizza and drinks and we began the celebration. The guys were amazed at how the boys have grown.

We finished dinner and headed to the seats. I handed C to Kenny and climbed to our seats with Brady. I reached out to take C back, but he had planted himself on Kenny's lap, and stayed there for much of the first half. He later sat with Johnny for a while--I love how he enjoys being with all the guys.

B wanted to sit in his own seat--it was funny because he wasn't heavy enough to keep the seat from folding up on him. At halftime we walked around the concourse--C rode on my shoulders while B held hands with Kenny and Johnny as they ran and picked him up to fly through the air. He was loving it.

The boys made it through the whole game--cheering often, clapping when the band played, being thrilled by the small blimp that flies through the arena. They switched places in the second half; B sitting with Kenny and C in his own seat. When they got restless late in the game, lollipops helped them get through to the end.

It was so fun watching my friends laughing and playing with my boys, and seeing how much the boys loved the guys. B loves Andy, who always makes him laugh. Johnny was great chasing the boys in and out of a curtained off area, then being told not to go back there (I think by the same usher who let me in the Patriot Club).

But the highlight for me was a moment when I looked over at C sitting on Kenny's lap, and watched C touching and fiddling with Kenny's fingers as they both watched the action on the court. One of those real "Life is good" moments. Thanks guys.

(this is reprinted from our family blog--which is available by invitation only. let me know if you'd like an invite.)

Sunday, October 18, 2009

The boys' first high school football game

(from our family blog)

Friday night I took the boys to their first high school football game. I've been subbing at North Stafford, and they were hosting their rival Stafford for homecoming. It was cold and wet, but the boys were eager, and I really wanted to take them to watch football.

Walking into the stadium was exciting. There was a light but thick rain falling; it looked really cool in the stadium lights. The band was playing, and there were teenagers everywhere. We found seats just before kick-off; I had packed dinner--sandwiches, grapes and cookies--so we started eating.

The boys were enjoying it--cheering when people cheered, watching the guys run up and down the field, listening to the band and the cheerleaders.

Early in the second quarter B said he wanted to go home, and began to repeat the request. We were all getting colder and wetter. I tried to get him to hold out till halftime, but he kept saying he wanted to leave, so we left near the end of the first half.

Halfway to the van, B changed his mind and said he wanted to go back and watch football. I told him that we had to go home, and he started to lose it. I had to drag/carry him to the van. He was tired, and when he's tired and gets focused on something, he doesn't let go.

The whole way home, every thirty seconds: "Daddy! I want to go back and watch the football! Please! (with lots of tears)."

After about 10 minutes of this, C spoke up, "No, we're going home!" It was classic.

It was really cool to experience another first with my boys. I remembered how fun those nights were as a teenager, and thought about how my boys would be out there in a few years, either playing or watching.

But for now, I love sharing all these special times with them, and I'm so grateful for each one.

North Stafford won 35-7.

Monday, October 05, 2009

the present

I've always been skeptical when I hear people say, "God told me..."

I've never heard God speak. But there have been times when I get the sense that God is trying to tell me something--through other people, something I read, the Spirit inside...

I've been getting that lately in this idea of living in the present. A few different friends have touched on this, and some different things I've been reading. In doing some self-examination, I was amazed to realize how little time I truly spend living in the moment.

I spend a little time looking back, remembering good times, questioning myself or others over things I wish were different. But I spend a LOT of time looking ahead--wondering, worrying, playing out different scenarios--and most of it is not productive.

As a result, I spend very little time truly living in the present. Enjoying where I am, who I'm with--not thinking about the past or the future, just really experiencing life right now...the sights, sounds and the smells...(can anyone name the movie reference?)

So this week I'm working on living in the present. Not letting worries about tomorrow get in the way. I do this best with my kids. They truly live in the present, and they help me do it as well. When I'm with them, just being--those are times when I really sense God's presence as well.

Friday, September 11, 2009

FBS's (first born son) first day of preschool

From our family blog:

B had his first day of preschool today. I know this is just the first of many milestones, but it was a big deal to me...I still get surprised at how emotional I become.

B was born a little over three years ago. My memory is pretty bad these days, but I remember so much about that day. J went into labor while at work; I went to pick her up and she tried to keep on working. Her co-workers forced her to leave, and we finally got on the road to the hospital.

By the time we got there her contractions were coming faster. We tried to walk from the parking lot, but she couldn't get very far so we drove to the emergency room and I got her inside. Her labor went quickly, and a few hours later Brady was born.

A lot of people cry when their babies are born, but I started crying about five minutes before B came out. I realized that this little person we had been talking and singing to and touching and loving was about to come and join us fully. I was filled with this amazing joy and began to cry.

When he came out, all messy and gooey, he was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

When I look back to that day, the last three years seem to have gone by in a blur. B is no longer a baby, he's a wonderful little boy with lots of personality, incredibly bright, and so much fun.

As we walked up the sidewalk toward his preschool, my eyes filled with tears as I thought that he is no longer completely ours--he also belongs to others with whom he will now build new relationships.

It was all worth it four hours later when I picked him up--he saw me come to the door of his class, yelled "Daddy!" and ran into my arms. I love being a dad.

Tuesday, September 08, 2009

President Obama to US students

I started a blog about the ridiculous protesting over the President's speech to students. Scrapped it and decided to just let the President speak:


Prepared Remarks of President Barack Obama
Back to School Event
Arlington, Virginia
September 8, 2009
The President: Hello everyone – how’s everybody doing today? I’m here with students at Wakefield High School in Arlington, Virginia. And we’ve got students tuning in from all across America, kindergarten through twelfth grade. I’m glad you all could join us today.
I know that for many of you, today is the first day of school. And for those of you in kindergarten, or starting middle or high school, it’s your first day in a new school, so it’s understandable if you’re a little nervous. I imagine there are some seniors out there who are feeling pretty good right now, with just one more year to go. And no matter what grade you’re in, some of you are probably wishing it were still summer, and you could’ve stayed in bed just a little longer this morning.
I know that feeling. When I was young, my family lived in Indonesia for a few years, and my mother didn’t have the money to send me where all the American kids went to school. So she decided to teach me extra lessons herself, Monday through Friday – at 4:30 in the morning.
Now I wasn’t too happy about getting up that early. A lot of times, I’d fall asleep right there at the kitchen table. But whenever I’d complain, my mother would just give me one of those looks and say, "This is no picnic for me either, buster."
So I know some of you are still adjusting to being back at school. But I’m here today because I have something important to discuss with you. I’m here because I want to talk with you about your education and what’s expected of all of you in this new school year.
Now I’ve given a lot of speeches about education. And I’ve talked a lot about responsibility.
I’ve talked about your teachers’ responsibility for inspiring you, and pushing you to learn.
I’ve talked about your parents’ responsibility for making sure you stay on track, and get your homework done, and don’t spend every waking hour in front of the TV or with that Xbox.
I’ve talked a lot about your government’s responsibility for setting high standards, supporting teachers and principals, and turning around schools that aren’t working where students aren’t getting the opportunities they deserve.
But at the end of the day, we can have the most dedicated teachers, the most supportive parents, and the best schools in the world – and none of it will matter unless all of you fulfill your responsibilities. Unless you show up to those schools; pay attention to those teachers; listen to your parents, grandparents and other adults; and put in the hard work it takes to succeed.
And that’s what I want to focus on today: the responsibility each of you has for your education. I want to start with the responsibility you have to yourself.
Every single one of you has something you’re good at. Every single one of you has something to offer. And you have a responsibility to yourself to discover what that is. That’s the opportunity an education can provide.
Maybe you could be a good writer – maybe even good enough to write a book or articles in a newspaper – but you might not know it until you write a paper for your English class. Maybe you could be an innovator or an inventor – maybe even good enough to come up with the next iPhone or a new medicine or vaccine – but you might not know it until you do a project for your science class. Maybe you could be a mayor or a Senator or a Supreme Court Justice, but you might not know that until you join student government or the debate team.
And no matter what you want to do with your life – I guarantee that you’ll need an education to do it. You want to be a doctor, or a teacher, or a police officer? You want to be a nurse or an architect, a lawyer or a member of our military? You’re going to need a good education for every single one of those careers. You can’t drop out of school and just drop into a good job. You’ve got to work for it and train for it and learn for it.
And this isn’t just important for your own life and your own future. What you make of your education will decide nothing less than the future of this country. What you’re learning in school today will determine whether we as a nation can meet our greatest challenges in the future.
You’ll need the knowledge and problem-solving skills you learn in science and math to cure diseases like cancer and AIDS, and to develop new energy technologies and protect our environment. You’ll need the insights and critical thinking skills you gain in history and social studies to fight poverty and homelessness, crime and discrimination, and make our nation more fair and more free. You’ll need the creativity and ingenuity you develop in all your classes to build new companies that will create new jobs and boost our economy.
We need every single one of you to develop your talents, skills and intellect so you can help solve our most difficult problems. If you don’t do that – if you quit on school – you’re not just quitting on yourself, you’re quitting on your country.
Now I know it’s not always easy to do well in school. I know a lot of you have challenges in your lives right now that can make it hard to focus on your schoolwork.
I get it. I know what that’s like. My father left my family when I was two years old, and I was raised by a single mother who struggled at times to pay the bills and wasn’t always able to give us things the other kids had. There were times when I missed having a father in my life. There were times when I was lonely and felt like I didn’t fit in.
So I wasn’t always as focused as I should have been. I did some things I’m not proud of, and got in more trouble than I should have. And my life could have easily taken a turn for the worse.
But I was fortunate. I got a lot of second chances and had the opportunity to go to college, and law school, and follow my dreams. My wife, our First Lady Michelle Obama, has a similar story. Neither of her parents had gone to college, and they didn’t have much. But they worked hard, and she worked hard, so that she could go to the best schools in this country.
Some of you might not have those advantages. Maybe you don’t have adults in your life who give you the support that you need. Maybe someone in your family has lost their job, and there’s not enough money to go around. Maybe you live in a neighborhood where you don’t feel safe, or have friends who are pressuring you to do things you know aren’t right.
But at the end of the day, the circumstances of your life – what you look like, where you come from, how much money you have, what you’ve got going on at home – that’s no excuse for neglecting your homework or having a bad attitude. That’s no excuse for talking back to your teacher, or cutting class, or dropping out of school. That’s no excuse for not trying.
Where you are right now doesn’t have to determine where you’ll end up. No one’s written your destiny for you. Here in America, you write your own destiny. You make your own future.
That’s what young people like you are doing every day, all across America.
Young people like Jazmin Perez, from Roma, Texas. Jazmin didn’t speak English when she first started school. Hardly anyone in her hometown went to college, and neither of her parents had gone either. But she worked hard, earned good grades, got a scholarship to Brown University, and is now in graduate school, studying public health, on her way to being Dr. Jazmin Perez.
I’m thinking about Andoni Schultz, from Los Altos, California, who’s fought brain cancer since he was three. He’s endured all sorts of treatments and surgeries, one of which affected his memory, so it took him much longer – hundreds of extra hours – to do his schoolwork. But he never fell behind, and he’s headed to college this fall.
And then there’s Shantell Steve, from my hometown of Chicago, Illinois. Even when bouncing from foster home to foster home in the toughest neighborhoods, she managed to get a job at a local health center; start a program to keep young people out of gangs; and she’s on track to graduate high school with honors and go on to college.
Jazmin, Andoni and Shantell aren’t any different from any of you. They faced challenges in their lives just like you do. But they refused to give up. They chose to take responsibility for their education and set goals for themselves. And I expect all of you to do the same.
That’s why today, I’m calling on each of you to set your own goals for your education – and to do everything you can to meet them. Your goal can be something as simple as doing all your homework, paying attention in class, or spending time each day reading a book. Maybe you’ll decide to get involved in an extracurricular activity, or volunteer in your community. Maybe you’ll decide to stand up for kids who are being teased or bullied because of who they are or how they look, because you believe, like I do, that all kids deserve a safe environment to study and learn. Maybe you’ll decide to take better care of yourself so you can be more ready to learn. And along those lines, I hope you’ll all wash your hands a lot, and stay home from school when you don’t feel well, so we can keep people from getting the flu this fall and winter.
Whatever you resolve to do, I want you to commit to it. I want you to really work at it.
I know that sometimes, you get the sense from TV that you can be rich and successful without any hard work -- that your ticket to success is through rapping or basketball or being a reality TV star, when chances are, you’re not going to be any of those things.
But the truth is, being successful is hard. You won’t love every subject you study. You won’t click with every teacher. Not every homework assignment will seem completely relevant to your life right this minute. And you won’t necessarily succeed at everything the first time you try.
That’s OK. Some of the most successful people in the world are the ones who’ve had the most failures. JK Rowling’s first Harry Potter book was rejected twelve times before it was finally published. Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team, and he lost hundreds of games and missed thousands of shots during his career. But he once said, "I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."
These people succeeded because they understand that you can’t let your failures define you – you have to let them teach you. You have to let them show you what to do differently next time. If you get in trouble, that doesn’t mean you’re a troublemaker, it means you need to try harder to behave. If you get a bad grade, that doesn’t mean you’re stupid, it just means you need to spend more time studying.
No one’s born being good at things, you become good at things through hard work. You’re not a varsity athlete the first time you play a new sport. You don’t hit every note the first time you sing a song. You’ve got to practice. It’s the same with your schoolwork. You might have to do a math problem a few times before you get it right, or read something a few times before you understand it, or do a few drafts of a paper before it’s good enough to hand in.
Don’t be afraid to ask questions. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. I do that every day. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of strength. It shows you have the courage to admit when you don’t know something, and to learn something new. So find an adult you trust – a parent, grandparent or teacher; a coach or counselor – and ask them to help you stay on track to meet your goals.
And even when you’re struggling, even when you’re discouraged, and you feel like other people have given up on you – don’t ever give up on yourself. Because when you give up on yourself, you give up on your country.
The story of America isn’t about people who quit when things got tough. It’s about people who kept going, who tried harder, who loved their country too much to do anything less than their best.
It’s the story of students who sat where you sit 250 years ago, and went on to wage a revolution and found this nation. Students who sat where you sit 75 years ago who overcame a Depression and won a world war; who fought for civil rights and put a man on the moon. Students who sat where you sit 20 years ago who founded Google, Twitter and Facebook and changed the way we communicate with each other.
So today, I want to ask you, what’s your contribution going to be? What problems are you going to solve? What discoveries will you make? What will a president who comes here in twenty or fifty or one hundred years say about what all of you did for this country?
Your families, your teachers, and I are doing everything we can to make sure you have the education you need to answer these questions. I’m working hard to fix up your classrooms and get you the books, equipment and computers you need to learn. But you’ve got to do your part too. So I expect you to get serious this year. I expect you to put your best effort into everything you do. I expect great things from each of you. So don’t let us down – don’t let your family or your country or yourself down. Make us all proud. I know you can do it.
Thank you, God bless you, and God bless America.

Thursday, September 03, 2009

personal update

OK, time to talk about something else, I don't want this blog to just be about politics, and don't want it to always be a debate.

Maybe a little personal update. (If you're not interested in that, I won't be offended if you stop reading here).

I left Convergence two months ago. It's been an interesting time. I've kept in touch with a couple of my closer friends there, but haven't communicate with most of the people. I miss them. But I also find myself hesitating to reach out.

I'm grieving. Letting go of some people, my job, my primary focus. It's kind of like when a relationship ends. Even if you know it was the right thing, it still hurts. you still miss the other person, but at the same time you try not to think about them too much, and although part of you wants to see them, you know it would hurt, so you keep your distance.

That's where I am. I am teaching at a local learning center, working with kids preparing to take the SAT. I enjoy the one-on-one nature of the teaching; getting to know some neat kids.

I umpired one baseball game, hoping to get a lot more in the next few weeks.

I have enjoyed spending more time with my children. We spent the day at Kings Dominion today, it was wonderful. Nothing has ever given more joy than my kids--I love playing with them, watching them experience and enjoy life, laughing, reading, talking, singing, dancing. It's great.

We're winding up the day with another chapter of our John Hughes film festival, watching the second half of Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Good stuff.

Friday, August 28, 2009

the non-apology apology

I was going to write a blog post about the lame, "I apologize if..." non-apology that we hear so much these days. The latest was Congresswoman Lynn Jenkins. She got into hot water by saying, "Republicans are struggling right now to find the great white hope."

When word got out, and she realized how racist her statement was, she offered this,

"I was unaware of any negative connotation, and if I offended anybody, obviously, I apologize," Jenkins told the Lawrence Journal-World. (bold mine)

So what you're saying is, if no one was offended, then you withdraw your apology?

Anyway, I was going to keep going, but then found this by Jim Buzinski, written several years ago, that beautifully says what I was thinking:

Apology Not Accepted: Let's Stop the Trend of "Non-Apolgy Apologies"

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

David Gushee on health-care reform

Great piece from David Gushee on the health-care reform debate:

The national debate raging over health-care reform has become a maelstrom of competing claims and counterclaims. It has been deeply infected by political demagoguery and hysteria.

The tenor of the debate raises the legitimate question as to whether our nation still has the capacity to tackle an enormously complex policy challenge such as this one. Each day we spend millions of dollars to defeat external threats -- but if we cannot address our own domestic problems any more effectively than this, then it will not be al Qaeda that undoes us.

The primary Christian interest in health-care reform is the moral imperative to extend adequate health care to all of our nation’s people. Why is health-care access a moral imperative? Choose your Scripture text or your moral theory, but they all point in the same direction:

(read the rest here)

Thursday, August 20, 2009

health-care debate


It's amazing how people can look at something and see two completely different things.

Watch Glenn Beck and Rachel Maddow one night; are these two even on the same planet?

Please, people--READ! Be informed! Don't just buy into the black and white rhetoric of either side. I am in favor of the reform being proposed. I don't think the current plan is the perfect answer to everything; but neither will it trigger the apocalypse, which is what many seem to think. Here are some great places to get some info:

Health-care misinformation: Big Numbers (by Mark Silva)

Health-care Reform: check the facts

Health-care resources from Sojourners

I read this in an article about the protests going on at town hall meetings. I know she's only 12, but I'm sure she is repeating what he was told by adults:

Another protester, 12-year-old Micah Vandenboom, was there with her parents.

She held a sign that made clear her opposition to the president's health-care reform plans.

"Under Obama, everyone will get the same health care, that's socialism," she said. "It has failed in other countries, you know, like Europe."

God forbid we try a system that treats people equally.

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Great piece on immigration

Panelists offer theological foundation
for immigration debate

By Ken Camp

NORMAN, Okla. (ABP) -- Baptists cannot deal with immigration biblically and ethically until they understand a basic stewardship principle: everything -- including the privilege of living in a particular country -- is a gift from God, said a panelist in a luncheon discussion held in conjunction with the New Baptist Covenant regional meeting in Norman, Okla.

"It all belongs to the Lord," said Javier Elizondo, executive vice president and provost at Baptist University of the Americas. "Democratic capitalism can flourish only when there is a consciousness of whom everything belongs to."

Elizondo said many Americans need the same reminder the nation of Israel required after they left bondage in Egypt and entered the Promised Land.

"Do not oppress the alien, because your ancestors were immigrants and aliens," he said.

Another panelist said Christians need to change their vocabulary when discussing volatile issues surrounding immigration.

"When we talk about 'us and them,' we are on the wrong side of the gospel," said Tom Ogburn, pastor of First Baptist Church in Oklahoma City. "It's not about 'us and them.' It's about us."

"We need to move past the language of marginalization to the language of inclusion," Ogburn said.

Richard Muñoz, director of the Immigration Service and Aid Center (ISAAC) program jointly sponsored by the Baptist General Convention of Texas and Buckner Children & Family Services, said Christians can faithfully observe both the New Testament mandates to obey legal authority and to welcome the stranger.

"I don't believe Romans 13 and Hebrews 13 are mutually contradictory," he said.

Muñoz, an attorney, said most undocumented immigrants in the United States entered the country legally but did not return home when their temporary visas expired. "We are trying to help immigrants comply with the law -- not break it," he said.

Suzii Paynter, director of the BGCT Christian Life Commission, told the audience to expect a cluster of immigration-related legislation to be introduced at the national level when Congress returns to work after an August recess.

She reported that Sen. Charles Schumer (D-N.Y.), chairman of the Senate Immigration Subcommittee, recently outlined seven principles that will form the basis for legislation he plans to introduce. They are:

-- Illegal immigration is wrong, and the goal of comprehensive immigration reform must be to curtail future illegal immigration.

-- Operational control of the borders through increases in infrastructure, technology and border personnel must be achieved within one year of enactment of legislation.

-- A biometric-based employer e-verification system with tough enforcement and auditing is needed to discourage illegal aliens and provide a certain and simple approach for employers.

-- Currently undocumented aliens living in the U.S. when legislation is enacted either must quickly register with the government and submit to a rigorous process of converting to legal status and earning a path to citizenship or face deportation.

-- Family reunification should be a cornerstone value of the immigration system.

-- Encourage the best and brightest to come to the U.S. as immigrants and create new technologies and businesses that will employ American workers, but discourage businesses from using immigration laws as a way to obtain temporary and less-expensive foreign labor to replace American workers.

-- Create a system that converts the current flow of unskilled illegal immigrants into the U.S. into a more manageable and controlled flow of legal immigrants who can be absorbed by our economy.

Paynter pointedly underscored an observation made earlier by Ogburn, that too often "conversations about immigration and about race become the same conversation."

When Paynter arrived in Norman, she said she picked up a packet someone anonymously had left for her at the registration desk. The envelope was filled with materials supporting white supremacy.

Paynter said some of the debate about immigration issues is colored by "a real fear of the loss of power and privilege."

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

back to baseball

Tomorrow is a day for which I've waited seven years.

In July 2002 I umpired my last baseball game. For five years, baseball was a huge part of my life. I worked 3 or 4 days a week, from March through November. I loved it. I loved the game, the kids, the excitement, the drama...I loved the friends I umped with, drinking beer and grilling brats after games, going to Razoos for drinks, retelling all the stories of our games...

Those last years in Texas, teaching and umpiring, were some of the best of my life. In 2002 I moved back to VA, got married, started a family, and went back to school. There just wasn't time for baseball. Each spring, when I drive by the local high school and see games going on, I feel a painful longing.

But now, with the changes in my job situation (not having one) baseball is a great opportunity for good part time work. So tomorrow night I umpire a game of 15 year-olds in Ashburn. The baseball probably won't be very good, and I'll be a little rusty, but I am so excited to get out there.

Monday, July 27, 2009

what to write

Haven't written since last week. I feel I should, but don't want to. Don't want to be to self-focused, but what the heck, it's my blog.

Pretty up and down these days. Being home with my family has given me wonderful time with my kids. In the last week we went to Kings Dominion, visited my parents at their camp on the Shenandoah River, swam in our neighborhood lake, danced, played football (Cash is a natural), read stories, made lots of great food, and went to church together at New Hope...

I am grateful for my family, that's really where my identity is these days, and that's good. but it's still a hard change.

For years, I was a pastor, and not just a pastor, but a pastor of a really cool and exciting church community. I loved my job, loved the people I worked with, and cared for, and hung out with. My identity was very tied into that job.

And now that I'm not there, a big part of my identity is kind of missing, or unclear. And the bottom line is that I'm grieving the loss of a ministry, and a lot of relationships that I am beginning to miss.

I will stay close with a few people at Convergence, but will drift away from most of them. I'm sad, but not depressed. I have really seen God work, and felt God's presence, and I am excited about the future (graduating Leland next spring, getting back into baseball--I umpire my first game in 7 years in 2 weeks, trying to read and write more).

But I know I will grieve the loss and change for a while as well. Fortunately, I'm not alone--my family is wonderful, my friends are great, and basketball season is not far away (Go GMU).

I feel pretty good tonight; so I'm gonna close and go to bed.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

healthcare arguments

some comments from people on facebook about President Obama's press conference tonight on healthcare reform:

He is full of it...and I don't know how Americans are so stupid to listen to him.

definitely totally full of crap, and I hate listening to the man, but I do because I want to know what he said so that I can refute it all!!! Grrr!!!

Obama's words don't match reality. If he's so concerned about the deficit, why did he spend trillions of dollars we didn't have.

I think responses like these show how self-centered we are as Americans. It's obvious the system is a mess. I have a hunch that most of the people who are complaining about the possible changes have the means to get good healthcare. They are getting what they want; so they are fearful of any change.

The problem with that attitude is that it doesn't consider those who can't afford healthcare. It baffles me how so many Christians just want to keep things the way they are going, especially financially--again, I think it's because they have what they need. They don't want taxes to go up. They don't care that the gap between rich and poor is growing.

How can anyone read the New Testament, especially the words of Jesus, and not take seriously the call to do EVERYTHING POSSIBLE to help, give, care for others, live lives of simplicity?

I'm not advocating socialism or communism, but where do we find Capitalism encouraged in the NT?

Perhaps if the church were really living out the principles of Jesus, really giving away our wealth, sacrificing, seriously caring for the least of these; we wouldn't need the government to take action like this.

Monday, July 20, 2009

The Guys' Rules

got this from Jamie a while ago...don't know who wrote them, but great job!

We always hear "The Rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note; these are all numbered "1" on purpose!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon and the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport; and no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! OBVIOUS hints do not work. JUST SAY IT!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question we ask.
1. Come to us with a problem ONLY if you want help in solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant to the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
1. All men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, we scratch it. Simple.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it's just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...REALLY.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know I have to sleep on the sofa tonight.
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Friday, July 10, 2009

vacation ramblings

Bellingham, WA

We're coming down to the home stretch of vacation--several activities this weekend for Jamie's 20 year high school reunion. We fly home next Tuesday. It's been a great vacation so far--very relaxing, good time with family and friends, time to think and enjoy my wife and kids, do some reading and writing.

I am looking forward to getting home and getting back into some routine. I am hoping to start doing some part-time work soon--umpiring baseball, something I loved doing when I lived in Texas.

Also looking for full-time work (something low-stress--the focus this fall will be on school).

There is a lot of work to do on the house and yard that I haven't had time for; hope to get some of that knocked out as well...

last night Jamie and I had dinner with her sister L and L's husband C. We always have fun with them, they are such great people. We ate a great Italian/Seafood restaurant called Mambo Italiano in Bellingham.

A lot of our conversation was about the birth of our kids--C and L have an adorable 13 month-old son. It was so nice to relax with great food and wine, and share our lives and stories with each other.

We are talking about moving out to Washington in the next couple years; I love it out there, and see great opportunities for ministry. It would be a beautiful place to raise our kids. We've actually been thinking and praying about it for a few years; now it seems the time is getting close (I'll finish my MDiv next spring).

I love Virginia--but life there feels so rushed and crowded and pressure-filled. Life in the Northwest seems a little slower, more relaxed. I love the mountains and the small towns and cities north of Seattle--would love to work in or near Bellingham....

OK, enough rambling today. On a spiritual note, the trip has helped me slow down and listen for God; especially in the conversations with people around me. It has been encouraging. Nap time is almost over, so I'm going to spend time with my boys.

Friday, July 03, 2009

who am I?

for the last three years, a large part of my identity has been found in my job, my ministry. I was pastor of a really amazing, innovative church that is breaking new ground and doing some things that will influence both church and culture.

Now I'm unemployed. I'm not looking for pity. I mean, I'm sitting next to a window in Burlington, WA, looking out on a beautiful back yard--trees, sunshine, flowers, while the rest of my family naps. It feels good to not have the stress I've been feeling for a while. It's great to be on vacation.

I am excited to get busy with school and look for some work that is low-stress. I'm also eager to spend more time with God--listening, praying, reading and writing. Anyone in ministry knows what a challenge it is to keep a healthy, intimate relationship with God.

I've done OK over the last three years, but not as well as I'd like. I'm looking forward to slowing down, spending some time in silence, and getting more dedicated to writing.

I'm also trying to lose some weight. I used to umpire high school baseball in Texas; I'm planning to get back into it (it's great part-time money and a lot of fun). I got out my old gear the other day and realized I need to order new pants or lose about 15 pounds fast.

So 5 days ago I went on a fast from sweets (I'm addicted to chocolate). No cookies. No ice cream. No candy. this is really hard---I can be stuffed after a meal, but don't feel like I can stop until I've had something sweet for dessert.

Yesterday we were out sightseeing and stopped in a little cafe on a river. Everyone else got ice cream; I had some cherry tomatoes. I feel lighter already.

I started off talking about identity. Since resigning my church that feels more complicated. I'm not a pastor anymore. I am a husband, father, student, writer, umpire, friend. seems like a pretty good list to me.

If you're still with me, thanks for reading as I did some self-therapy today. I hope you are well.

Monday, June 29, 2009

farewell at Convergence

Last night was my last at Convergence; the service was basically a time to honor and thank me. It was very touching and encouraging to hear so many people share how I have impacted them. I felt very blessed.

I wish I had copies of everything everyone said--it was really beautiful. Here is a poem my friend Mike wrote during the service:

Todd
of short hair
and long temper

stretching himself
every day
from Stafford
to here
and back again

endurance
to push and pull
to plug away
to make a way

leading from the heart
loving from the gut
both family,
and family of faith

shepherd
soft and hard


It hasn't really sunk in yet that I won't be going to work at Convergence anymore. I am at peace with the decision, and excited about the future, but I will miss seeing so many people on a regular basis. I am only letting those feelings in a little at a time; it's too much to face all at once.

I have done some little things to move on--changing my info on websites and blog...strange to be unemployed...

But I know many of those friendships will continue; so many people at Convergence have become a big part of my life.

Now I need to get busy preparing for our vacation--lots to do.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

my rambling thoughts on thursday's passings

I really had to wait a couple days; couldn't really get my mind around the deaths of Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson. I'm feeling really old right now.

When I was 11, watching Charlie's Angels was the highlight of my week. I was in love with Farrah. I had that poster on my wall; probably all the way through high school. She was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen; and was the first to stir some strange new feelings in me.

I followed her career, and was glad that she had some later success. I thought she got kind of strange in her later years, but always appreciated her spirit.

Michael Jackson--wow. I'm still in shock. He was as big as they come. His music, along with a few other artists, created the soundtrack for my first 20 years. I remember watching the Jackson 5 Saturday morning cartoon when I was 6 or 7. I remember dancing to the Off the Wall album at high school dance parties.

Thriller provided the biggest music for my senior year in high school. Dances, parties, "Billie Jean" and "Beat It" blasting from boom boxes and car stereos.

Michael Jackson was the artist that everyone listened to--no matter what color you were or which crowd you ran with. He was one of those people you felt connected to, because of the music.

I remember the day Elvis died--where I was and what I was doing when I heard the news (at my friend Michael Brown's house, working on our bikes in his backyard). That night my next door neighbor Paul sat on his back patio and got drunk while blasting Elvis songs on his stereo.

That was big, but Elvis was from my parents' generation. Michael Jackson was ours.

I heard about Michael Jackson on a plane that had just landed in Chicago; another passenger had turned his phone on and received a text with the news. I couldn't believe it. I still can't.

I didn't care much for his music in later years, and felt he had become so bizarre that I couldn't really connect with him anymore. He seemed like such a sad person--not really the same one I had listened to years before.

But I will always remember the little boy with amazing talent, and the young man who broke down barriers and helped us to party and celebrate life. I've been listening to his music more the last few days than I had in years. It brings back great memories, and helps me both celebrate his life and grieve his death.

Thanks Michael and Farrah, I hope you are at peace.