My Happy Place

I have found that baseball keeps me sane, steady, somewhat healthy. My life has been stressful the last few years. I spent many years in a marriage that was unhealthy. I ended up leaving a job from which I thought I'd retire. There were parts of my life that were good--mainly my relationships with my kids, and friends, my job at Faithlife (until the end). And baseball. 

Whatever else is going on, I'm at peace when I'm on a baseball field--whether coaching or umpiring or watching my boys play. The baseball field is my happy place.

I've needed that in recent years. As my friend and mentor David Blanton has said, I have become "well acquainted with grief."

In 2017 my best friend Dale died of a heart attack. We had been friends since we were nine years old. He was my go-to person.

My friend Rick died that same year, also of a heart attack. Years earlier Rick and I had gone to grad school together and taught at a Christian school together in Texas.

Later that year my pastor Dave died of brain cancer. Dave had been a good friend and encourager for many years.

In 2019 my mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer; she died in 2021. I cannot say enough about how much my mother meant to me, and how losing her has impacted my life.

Also in 2021 my good friend Nick died in a car accident. Nick had been Cash's soccer coach for many years, and I had been his son's baseball coach. Nick was one of those guys who was always a joy to be around.

In 2022 my grandmother died at 99 years old. She lived in Nashville and I was grateful to have regular visits and grow closer to her in recent years.

In 2023 my dear friend Pete died of cancer. Pete hired me at Logos Bible Software when we moved from Virginia to Washington in 2011. We worked together for a short time, but he had a big impact on me and we stayed close over the years. I had several special visits with him in his final years, including one just a few days before he died. 

I have grieved a lot over the last six years. But year in and year out, I always find joy on the baseball field. First it was through coaching my boys from T-ball (ages 5-6), through Little League (7-12) and into Babe Ruth (13-14). Over the last few years it's been watching them play travel and high school ball. 

When the boys are not playing, I umpire. I started back in the 90's when I lived in Texas and have done it on and off over the years. I love watching baseball on TV, and going to Mariners' games whenever we can.

A few weeks ago I started having heart palpitations. I've been to the doctor, and he says everything is fine. It's probably caused by stress; just a lot going on these days. But I've noticed that when I'm watching the boys play, or when I'm umpiring, or when I'm watching the Mariners play on TV with my boys and my friend Johnny, the palpitations stop. The stress leaves my mind and body. 

Baseball is more than just a game. It has healing properties. Baseball calms me, and gives me peace. The baseball field is my happy place.